The Life and Story of Hinata
by Lumberry
Summary: She's depressed constantly until she meets a few very special people who pull her out of darkness. There's Naruto and Ino not to mention possible relationships with Kiba, Sasuke...or are these just more complications to throw her into depression again?
1. Before the Stench of Death

Yay!! Hinata! I've always wanted to do something from her point of view!

It's Thanksgiving!!!! We're holding a party :D

Sorry if it's short. **PLEASE REVIEW!!** dies

* * *

**November 22**

I'm yawning again. Doesn't Father know his speeches are so boring? He sees my look and gets up, all red in the face before he berates me for not trying hard enough.

"Hinata! This is training! You'll never become a shinobi this way!"

A shinobi is a work of art, a self-sacrifice. You need to work hard.

"A shinobi is a work of art!! Hinata, you can't become one without training!"

Oh, well. Close enough. "Gomenasai," I say meekly, dropping my stance and bowing.

"Hinata."

Not _this_ tone again.

"You are only three years of age, but you are very intelligent. Perhaps too intelligent. You need focus, discipline, and practice. Training is – "

Trying to be as uncynical as possible I whisper, "Yes, Father. I'm sorry."

"You need to practice!" he rants. "Practice is crucial! You need to have the power to know, the knowledge of understanding, and the will to protect yourself and others! Do you hear me?"

"Yeees, Father." This time it had a sarcastic spin, but he was already stomping away.

My family sucks… as if I _need_ protection or anything. It's Thanksgiving and all they do is prance around _practicing_ and _training_.

That was yesterday.

The day before _everything_ changed. Before I became small and shy and lost all confidence. That night was crucial to the hell my life was. It reforms me, remakes me, into a person who _I_ am sick of.

* * *

So how was it? Review or message me!

o :D

Lumberrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry


	2. Eighth Grade

Did any of you read "Speak?" I'm trying to match the tone, and it's harder than I think! But then again, it's not that hard and I like it!

Stuff your faces; Happy Thanksgiving!!

Author's Note: I don't own Hinata but the reason why I'm upset is because I don't own Neji as well!!! Boo hoo

* * *

_Years later..._

**September 6,** Year of the Crescent Moon

I start eighth grade today. What a bummer.

Students mill around like mosquitoes, whining about this or that. If they had had the life I had, and the memories I had, they'd be dead whining by now.

I jam up my locker during homeroom.

"Need any help?" A blonde was smiling but overfriendly.

What a loser. I don't talk. It's easier to be ignored if I stay silent.

My locker opened with a clang, and I chose my books.

By the time I'd slammed it shut he was gone. Probably strolling around like all the over idiots. Maybe I should have been nicer.

But then again, it's futile.

First period crawls in, full of happy-go-lucky students milling around each other's desks. I open my assignment book, start to write down the homework, and then drop my pen and lean back.

What's the point? The homework was signing a paper on the teacher's specific rules. I'd just bring it to my father, and he'd look for an excuse to lecture me on the pains to be a ninja. It's better to avoid him like a bad spill on a highway. Caution: risk of getting heavily lectured.

I'd sign it myself.

The teacher had black hair and a warm smile as she surveyed the room, evidently not knowing what idiots she was looking at. "I'm Kurenai-san," she said, nearly sang, and I try not to puke.

Who the heck does she think she is? Do all teachers act like doting mothers?

I rest my head down, studied the notes inscribed on the wooden desks (I love you, Tsunade, talk to me Jiraiya) and promptly closed my eyes.

When the bell rings I'm still full of sleepiness. A talkative blond girl taps my arm. "Wake up! God, it's the first day."

"I know!" I snap back reflexively, scooping up my books and going out the door in one fluid motion. It would have been eloquent save for the laces of my sneaker that got caught in some hinge behind the stupid door.

Two girls, the blonde, and one with pink hair, stare at me for a few seconds. I shake my foot vainly, trying to force it loose.

Finally the pink-haired one gets behind the door and unhooks the laces, smiling. "They're getting new doors installed next week." Even her eyes light up, green and bright. Smiley smiley smiley.

I'm sick of smileys. I'd rather a room full of frowning people. Without an acknowledgement I turned and hightailed to second period, knowing I'd be late.

But who cared? The teacher wouldn't; it was the first day and student got away with murder. If anyone talked to me I'd just turn away. I wouldn't talk, wouldn't speak.

Maybe they'd think I was deaf, but that was better than the truth.

I blink to keep from bursting into tears.

* * *

There!! Second chapter is longer (but not that long, sob) and slightly interesting. Hopefully yours,

Review!!!

Lumberrrrrrrrrrry


	3. Not Enough to be a Loser

My third chapter!!

* * *

Second period is English. Last year – sixth grade – It was horrible. We had to do essays on stupid jutsus all the time, 24/7. This year would be no different, and especially difficult because I skipped a grade.

I throw my stuff on the table, fold my arms, and sigh, knowing what to expect.

A teacher clad in green walks in, grinning broadly. A girl that had her hair in two Chinese-style buns spits out her gum, the blond girl snickers, and Neji rolls his eyes.

Sharp icicles plunge themselves into my heart. Neji's here. Great.

_That_ makes my eighth grade year much more complicated.

Memories worm into my mind, as much as I'd like to eradicate them forever.

_The dark night. I'd been asleep. An innocent little girl who'd been kidnapped._

_An innocent little girl…who the price to pay were two lives._

_It'd been asleep the whole time. I suspected that my father used a sleeping jutsu on me so I wouldn't have to go through what had to be the worst thing in the Hyuuga clan has ever faced._

_Two lives that day, wasted, shredded, blasted into smithereens._

I glance at Neji – I haven't seen him in over two years. He seems fine, sane. Had he went through what I did? – shame, unrecognition, being lowlife?

It was his father that died, and he that was the victim of the curse mark, yet…

_I_ was branded also. Branded in the fact that whenever a member of the Hyuuga clan looks at me all I can see are two shards of pale ice. Inadvertent or no, I had been the cause of the catastrophe.

I, who was the sole heiress of the clan.

Lotsa crap _that_ title holds.

The sensei sings, awaking me from my flashback. "The Spring of Youth!" he cries, grinning and winking at the same time. Or attempting to, anyhow.

A skinny idiot also wearing a tight green suit raises his fist into the air and yells with him.

I survey the classroom, not knowing these people. Was it normal? Natural, even, to have those two with tears streaming down their faces?

The other students' expression varied from disgust to annoyance.

Yes…yes, it was.

Self-pity curls in my stomach. Even these two imbeciles have a place in the ninja world. Even these two losers.

I look at everyone with animosity in my eyes. I hate my life. I hate the world. I hate hating it. I _hate_ it.

* * *

Third period is math. Good; finally a subject I can live through.

I can do math. It's numbers, you do this and that, multiply, divide, and voila, answer.

A stern looking man was up front. "I'm Iruka sensei," he affirms, walking around. His sandals squeak on the linoleum floor like fingernails on a chalkboard. "Tell me what you learned last year."

The student wearing a prominant Uchiha shirt raises his hand. "Distances of kunais and their specialties, speed, and rate." His tone is bored, scathing.

"Good job, Sasuke!" squeals the pink-haired girl.

I look around for the blond one. Weren't they attached at the hip? No; she was in another class.

"We'll do harder things this year. Much harder. It's the transition for the Chuunin exam, which comes at the end of this year." He passes out pamphlets. "You need to subscribe for a math textbook for your very own work."

I hate this class. It's boring. The love for math has disappeared completely. Funny what eighth grade does to you.

* * *

Yes, Hinata is Out of Character, but only on the inside! She's not as shy as you think!!

Yay Thanksgiving!!

c :D

Lumberrrrrrrrrrrrrrry


	4. Naruto

She finally meets Naruto!! Hooooorah!!

And Hinata is sort of portrayed as slightly depressed.

But keep reading :)

* * *

By fourth period I'm so hungry I can barely move. As I walk in I notice... art class has one good factor, and that's to control my hunger by smelling like linseed oil. 

_Now_ all I have to do is to pretend I'm listening and try not to puke.

Did I mention I hate art class?

I have this habit of surveying the room. Both kunoichis are back to talking full force. They giggle and point to the back of someone who looks suspiciously like Sasuke. I figure there are only about two classes going at the same time in this dinky eighth grade for me to be stuck with them again.

The teacher, though not old, had white hair, one visible eye, the gracefulness of a dog, and a black, tight-fitting mask. Painful.

_Kakashi Hatake_, he writes on the board. He wears drab gray colors.

_Dog man_, I embellish in my head.

He passes out the parent-teacher-student-we-are-one-gigantic-happy-family contracts and sits back to let us talk until the bell rings. Good with me. I doodle in my notebook. A flower. A kunai. A kunai piercing a flower. I could have laughed at the irony but don't feel like it.

I don't laugh anymore, not since -

"So we're free to talk the whole period...that's cool," says someone behind me appreciatively.

I turn around, expecting to see another drone dressed in gray.

But no. It was all orange, pure fresh orange, and very bright at that. The blond kid was sitting leisurely with his feet on the back of my chair.

I choose this opportunity to slide my chair forward a few feet. I hope he has insurance.

"Aaaah-eeee!" he yells, his legs comically flailing. He pitched forward, his eyes like saucers.

Even I crack a smile, until he grabbed the nearest solid thing he touched - the legs of my chair.

The wind _whoooooooshed_ out of me as I fall, my hands frantically trying to hold something strong for support.

They don't. And I hit the floor, winded, seeing the blond kid grinning and offering a hand.

"Dijabou?" he inquires, still holding out a hand. He has a rather large bruise on his arm, and I feel sorry for what I'd done, but that thought flashes away like the other ones, leaving behind the tough and reolute Hinata behind.

I pick myself up and forefully sidestep him. I sat down on my chair, catching my breath and trying to ignore the penetrating stares.

I succeed, and they look away to leave me alone. I have a good force field.

A tap makes me turn around. _Now _what is it?! Angry, irritated Hinata is back.

Funny. I haven't felt much anger since...

"Who are you, anyway?" he asks, squinting. The lines on his cheeks stand out, black next to his skin.

"..." I choose not to talk. Let them think I'm mental. Anything but talk.

"What's your name?"

Your face.

His eyes widen, as if he finally realizes something. "Ohhh, you're Hinata, right? Neji's cousin? You have the same eyes."

The pink-haired girl slaps his head. "Naruto!" she exclaims, as he yells. "What did you do _now?_ Stop annoying the crap out of people!"

Good for her. I try not to yawn. The second tick by as she berates him for annoying, for existing, for breathing. _For existing._

_If...If I hadn't existed, what would the Hyuuga clan be like? Would Hanabi be ruler? Would she be the reason for the demis is Neji's father?_

_...would Neji hate her as much as he hates me now?_

_I wish..._

_if life is existence, then what is death? A passing, a grievance...and - then..._

_everyone..._

_forgets about you._

"Hinata." The voice is remarkably close. The pink-haired kunoichi stands there, holding a yelling Naruto by one painfully throbbing ear.

"H-huh?" I snap out of my memories. "What?"

I...spoke.

"Are you okay?" She peers at me, as if she can read my mind, peer into its inky depths. "Naruto is such a pain sometimes. Sorry, okay?"

I nod hazily. The bell rings. For once, I don't bolt out of the classroom.

* * *

I'll never know the potential of my writing skills if you guys don't review!!

:) On a second broader note, what skills?

Lumberrrrrrrrry


	5. Lunch Tables

Hi!! I've written so much in so little of a day and I'm proud of myself! Plz review and happy Thanksgiving!! Remember the lives of the turkeys!!

Hinata is slightly nicer in this chapter, but just slightly ;)

* * *

The period before lunch. It's pure torture. 

I sit in the farthest seat in the back, and try to ignore the dire warnings flashed by my stomach. No one's in this class that I know except Sasuke. Take that back. I don't know him. And I probably never will.

A boy with two red marks down each of the sides of his cheeks stares at me, as if surprised. There is a dog on his head. I wish I could be surprised but I'm just not. School and the remnants of my life takes that out of me.

The class is called Weaponry. The teacher, a short, slender woman with short black hair, a nervous personality, and tall high heels, takes attendance. When it's my turn I raise my hand. The others raise their eyebrows.

Everyone belongs to something, a family, a clan, a person who loves them. Or friends. Or even a pet.

_I'm alone_.

The words skim across my brain like a beetle in water and I use my mental power to drown it.

"Get out a kunai and start practicing," she says, pointing to the targets outside. She opens the window – not fully, though, as if she expects us to have at least some small amount of accuracy.

I have to hand it to her, she's delusional.

I take out a weathered kunai and aim. I haven't practiced since three months ago. And even then I was far from perfect.

Without much enthusiasm I throw it. The tip grazes the glass just before it's caught by a hand.

"Nice catch, Kiba," says Shizune, a bit too relieved. Then I see the glass that it barely touched. It was stained glass, a picture of the Hyuuga clan.

_That's ironic_, was the last thought before tears started sliding down my face. I wipe my tears away roughly, unforgiving myself.

God, am I weak. I can't even throw a kunai and that's the basics.

I will be acing this class!

As I pack up my books, ready to rush out for lunch, a dog yips plaintively.

From the boy's head.

Does he live there or something? Where does the dog…? (A/N: ...)

The guy called Kiba meets me at the door, he and his doggie pal eyeing me. I don't mind. Everyone does. The only thing to do is stare back until they look away.

Except they didn't.

"Akamaru smells tears," the boy explains, as if that will evoke me to talk. Nope. He peers at me. "Were you crying?"

It's embarrassing and true. What to do?

"No," I return, glad my voice is strong. "I _haven't_."

"Hm." I can't describe his expression; he turns away before I do, having the last word.

Inwardly I sigh and roll my eyes.

It's finally lunchtime and it's all I can do to not scream like a maniac and cut in line.

Instead I wait, choosing sushi. Plain and rather expensive here. The blond guy in the front gets three plates of ramen topped with narutos.

Does he enjoy eating things called his own name?

By the time I get out of line lunch had already started – ten minutes wasted, in fact.

_Where to sit?_

Usually, in sixth grade, I'd sit in the empty seat by the window. However, this was a new school, a smaller lunchroom, a new predicament.

Three lunch tables.

_Largest table: __Naruto, Sakura, a guy in a huge coat, two guys, one skinny, one fat, __Neji, __and Kiba._ Possibly. Last resort. But…

_Creepy__ green guy with bug eyes and bowl cut, one other guy, a girl__, Gai-sensei (I thought teachers weren'__t supposed to sit__ here?)_ Heck no.

_Sasuke, the blond girl, a red-haired guy, another guy, and a girl._ No. I don't know any of them.

There were no empty seats, no reservoirs of refuge.

I sigh and walk my way through the trashcans, then as quietly as possible and possibly, place my tray on the far end by Sakura. Thank god in heaven Neji was sitting on the other side of the table.

I pick up my fork and start to eat, trying to be imperceptible and barely noticed. Quiet. Shy.

_Invisible. Never existing._

_Never…_

_existed._

Sakura notices me straight away. Crap. "Hi," she says, smiling. "Hinata, right?"

Idiot, right? I nod to get her off my back. She takes the hint, with a steely look. "Don't be that way." She sighs. "Everyone acts like that sometimes. You know, mood swings?"

I force a gulp of water down my throat, nearly choking.

Mood swings? MOOD SWINGS?!

"I don't have mood swings!" I snap loudly, trying to look as intimidating as possible.

Oops. Half the table turns to stare at me. I blush and look down.

_What's WITH me?! I never blush. I have. Never. Blushed. It's only because it's the first day. I hate it, I hate itIhateit!!!_

Naruto hears, grinning. "You can just let go, you know, Hinata," he says, quiet compared to my tone before. "Sakura's right. It's school. Stressful but manageable. It's okay if you act that way, though." He stretches, seemingly proud of his speech.

Poignant. Manageable must've been the longest word that has escaped his mouth.

I can't let him get away like that, feeling too good. "You eat a lot."

"I love ramen!" he proclaims, his cerulean blue eyes bright. His grin is wider, and he studies me, watching for the reaction to his profession of love.

Ugh. Happiness for some food? What a waste.

"How were your grades last year?"

God, there has to be _something_ that irritates him.

"Fine. I barely passed." He grins meekly at Sakura. She hits him.

"Barely passed, right!" (A/N: The first thought crossing my mind was Sakura saying "Barely passed, my foot! or Barely passed, my butt!" But...)

"The only _reason_ you passed the genin test was because of me and Sasuke."

I notice his blush. He likes her.

Brilliant. A not-too-subtle weakness.

I'm just about to talk when I realize that I _want_ to talk, to express myself. That's scary. I'm changing. Why can't I just cling to myself?

_The only person you can trust is yourself…everyone else is liable to lie or backstab you._

For the rest of lunch I stay silent.

* * *

How's that? Even Hinata is prone to explosion.

It's only a little while before Neji is in the picture. (Neji MUST be in the picture! It's LAW!!)

Lumberrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry


	6. Gym Class

Disclaimeeeeeeeeeeeeeer: Hinata belongs to Kishimoto but the tragic part is so does Neji!! sobs

* * *

I walk out of the cafeteria breathing hard as if I'd been running. Note to self: that happens when you socialize for the first time!! 

I occupy myself in seventh period drawing squiggles on my assignment book.

On looks round, like a naruto...

"Hyuuga Hinata!" - my attention gets caught immediately by Morino Ibiki's brusque tone.

_Like father..._

"I - " All eyes are on me. Hastily I cover the drawings up with my hand. "Nothing."

His composure makes me nervous (but just a little). I look at anything but the jagged scars running across his face. The teacher walks on leisurely, and I am forgotten.

I relax. Every teacher takes it easy on students' first day.

But - he strolls _towards_ me.

Surprised, I don't give a reaction when he takes the notebook.

" - I..." I stammer. No one's perfect.

Teacher or not, he didn't have the right to take it! My eyes dart around the room, confirming that every set of eyes are trained towards me, including - Neji's -

I look away quickly. Anything but his gaze.

His glare.

"Naruto, eh?" Morino (the Moron) raises his scarred eyebrows, and hands it back. His tone is severe, but apparently there's no detention involved.

My complete and utter embarrassment satisfies him. _More_ than satisfies him.

Faintly I recall his name on a group list of Psychology ninjas. He had the power to - he knew the human mind...

_Creepy_.

I look down, trying to drown out his voice, waiting out the stares

"Naruto the naruto" is written on the notebook. I nearly laugh, then compress it quickly.

I don't remember writing it, but I guess it has to be results from the teacher's boring speech.

"...And Hinata has just proved she's an average ninja," drones a voice.

I look up, ready to sock anyone, then deflate.

Teacher Morino looks at the class. "You will never be a ninja if you cannot understand the mind and its functions. Anyone here interested in genjutsu?"

Hands shoot up; Sakura's and the blond girl's. I notice; not Neji.

"I have been talking in an exceptionally flat monotone," he explains, surveying the class. "It seems as though you all were paying attention. An average ninja could not." He smiles suddenly, the gesture alien upon his face. It's doesn't belong.

It stretches the scar upward into a grimace. "An average ninja for a fourth grader."

I feel our egos deflate. Two ninjas actually wince. Wusses.

* * *

Eight period awaits - gym. It's a year long event where every eighth grader participates. It's a living _h_. The students mill in, and I blend in the throng. 

The gym appears like a butterfly after a caterpillar.

Huge banners and posters align each wall like they'd been magnified thirty times. Scenes of important ninjas fighting commenced in the pictures, looking alive.

Finally...

Finally I see something the dinky little school has something to show off.

I change in the girl's bathroom while other girls snap at me.

"We're all girls here!"

"I have to go soooooo badly!"

"Change _out_side like a _normal_ girl!!"

"Hiss!"

"Scratch!"

Stalling now as slowly and as deliberately, I slip into the ugly gray gym shirt and the long, winter sweatpants.

Sakura glances sympathetically as the blond girl gives me a glare when she steps in. I try not to yawn. What she doesn't know is how much the glare is nullified by the fact she_ "has to go sooooooo badly_."

"Ino's always like that," Sakura whispers, smiling a little.

I try not to yawn, and step into the gym, feeling consciously like a small mouse in an immense trap.

Someone unimportant.

Gai-sensei leads us into the middle, grinning like an idiot. In the corner of my eye I see the bug-eyed, bowl-cut boy grin, if any possible, even stretchier and larger, back.

The guys wear black short-sleeved polos and black sweatpants.

Gray shirts crowd around certain black-shirted people.

It's listed so blatantly;

_Predators_: Ino, girl with Chinese buns in her hair, a million other idiots.

_Prey_: Sasuke, Neji, and a few other guys who actually looked as if they _enjoyed_ the sick attention.

I feel a curious twinge in my chest as I watch a girl fawning over - Neji - like candy melting in the sun.

Then, unexpectedly - Neji turns away and mouths something rude.

The girl looks like she's on the verge of tears.

_Coldhearted Neji..._

_Isn't it...because of...me?_

* * *

I see the expression on his face as he shrieks, "FATHER!"

His eyes are huge and he's crying.

crying,

large sobs racking his tiny frame.

* * *

I try to shrug it away. 

Why should I care for someone like _him_? I just saw his jerkiness real-live and up close!

Another voice forces itself into my head. It's been so long, Neji! I feel like screaming.

_Why won't you acknowledge me?_

Give me... existence, at least. God, it's like I never existed!

Hatred. Disgust. Fear. Revulsion.

But not...

Don't...ignore me...

_anymore._

* * *

Annoying voice: So how's that?!

Someone review :)

I love to write but I also love compliments/_constructive_ criticism.

So there!

Byyee.

Lumberrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry


	7. My Team of Four

_Day after Thanksgiving :)_

Arm wrestling, huh? (flashback: me winning) (all other flashbacks: me losing)

I'm not that good but I can try!!

(only flashback with a "win" :

Me: Let's do reverse arm wrestling! You pull instead of push.

Foe: Okay.

Me: (loses) Hahahaha!

Foe: What?

Me: I lost, but it's _reversed_, so I win!! I won!!!)

* * *

"All right, Class!" booms the deep and rather annoying voice of Gai-sensei. "I will now take…" 

A few student lean in, breathless, hanging onto his every word.

"…Attendance!!!!"

"Aburame Shino…"

After attendance he beams widely to show off his white teeth. "There are four groups!" he explains, flashing another broad grin, "I've already put you in your alphabetical groups. Goal is arm wrestling!" Another show of teeth.

"Best of the team is made Captain! Captains will then challenge each other, representing the team!

Ready, set…GO!"

I'm trying not to roll my eyes. Proving to be rater difficult.

All teachers are such idiots to expect I can physically _do_ anything but mope around.

There are three more ninja in my group;

Gaara, Ino Yamanaka, Hyuuga Neji.

Hyuuga Neji…

Heart stop breath ceases mind blank mouth dry.

_Hyuuga_ Hinata.

_Hyuuga_ Neji.

'Doh. I get it.

I gulp and look for an exit.

* * *

"G-Gai-sensei," I say in a rush, "I feel a - a headache. I need to go to the n - " 

"Nonsense! The Dash for the Springtime of Youth shall make you feel stronger!" He flashes that freaking annoying grin.

"It - it really hurts." Time to start thinking...

_Anything to get away from..._

_Him._

"Please?" I stare at him innocently through my bangs. "My stomach hurts, too."

"That's okaaaay!" He flashes a quick smile. "You don't need to - "

Shoot. Double Crap. This teacher is hard to convince.

I start the teary-eyes thing. It seems so easy now, so fluid.

"P-p-ple - "

Students stare at me like I'm an alien with three heads and two fingers. I see Ino whispering to another girl, a brunette, who nods vigorously back but I don't care.

I do not care.

All I want is some peace in my life. Some refuge. If I'm not granted that, then there's absolutely _no_ way I'm staying.

"Maito!"

A clear, bossy female voice startles him and I choose this opportunity to keep crying.

When he glances back all that's left will be a puddle of tears.

"Ah. Tsunade." He bows low in recognition. "Our very own principal! You look puchritudinous today." (A/N: Pulchritudinous means beyootiful.)

She rolls her eyes, taps her foot.

Our doting sensei flashes three sparkles at once - two on each of his front teeth and one in the usual corner.

My tears overflow in disgust.

"My student here feels sick," he says to her, nodding to me.

Tsunade has her hair in two pigtails that swing as she glances over at me and gives me a once-over. "Nah. Nothing. Another faker."

What?! One look and she...Or maybe _she's_ the fake one.

Gai-sensei nods understandingly. As if he knows anything. "Well, Hinata, you will just play for now!"

I hate this class.

Having no choice, I walk over to Neji's group.

The blond girl - Ino - is sullking.

I wonder how fast he ditched her?

I sit down warily next to the red-haired - Gaara - and try to look inconspicous. If we're arm wrestling the best bet I have is to give up immediately.

I'm not a fighter. I'd much rather be either a cheater or a giver-upper.

"You will now fight your teammates! This is hard work and needs a loyal ninja! GO!!"

Good grief. We're _arm wrestling._

Ino doesn't look at us, but her expression is plain from her tone of voice, her avoidance from Neji's eye contact. "I - I'll go against G-Gaara."

Neji sighs and turns towards me.

_His face..._

It's tense and unrelaxed, with the eyes of someone much, much older.

This isn't just a stupid little competition for him. It's to test my skills and how well he practiced compared to me.

My posture flashes competition as well. Blood pumps. Eyes narrow.

A few seconds of just seeing me, and he wants to kill me at some dumb game?

It's on.

* * *

Yay Neji!!!

- is all I have to say :) Keep reviewing :D

Lumberrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry


	8. Arm Wrestling Jerks

Good luck Hinata!!

GOOD LUCK NEJI!!

I mean, Hinata.

* * *

"Once or best out of three?" 

His voice is like stone; smooth, unbreakable, in low tones.

I know I can't do once; this must be a rhetorical question.

"Best out of three."

I am not going to act like some quiet, shy idiot. His right hand closes over mine, much warmer (and drier for that matter).

Strategy? To try. At least give him a hard time.

"First round," he says, looking at me. I feel the harshness of his glare and I look down.

"One, two...three!"

His hand is a deadweight. Pretty soon I'm down.

"Second round," he says, this time with a small smirk.

_He thinks it's easy to beat me after all these years..._

_I'm not going to lose! _bursts out a voice.

_He's an arrogant jerk who is lucky enough to be MY cousin. I can beat him easy!!!_

This confidence is annoying me...

"...three."

_I'm..._

His hand forces mine down again.

_Not..._

I fight, one inch above the hard table. My tendons stan out plainly. I'm struggling.

_Going..._

He's stalling! - to see what small amount of energy an hold me at bay.

_He's not even trying!_

_To..._

A surge of anger propels my hand. I ram our hands over against the table.

_Lose._

Ouch.

"Nice job." But the smirk is still there. He knows how much that took out of me, knows that he's stronger, I'm weaker.

I picture him as an old man, rocking back and forth on his chair and smirking. (A/N: Rofl!! To me, anyway. I have a strange mind :)

I grin. It's so different, so completely alien on my face.

A flicker of doubt enters his eyes.

"Third round." His eyes are on mine, but so are mine on his.

_I have a chance._

"One...two...three!"

It's over before I can blink. He slams his hand down, easily, flexibly.

I wince a the pain shoots up my arm._ Curse him...!_

He faces away from me, eyes forward, unblinking.

I _know_ that smirk is still there, on the other side of his face. It annoys the crap out of me.

Ino and Gaara come over, Ino holding her arm and grimacing, the other taciturn.

Neji takes the challenge without a single word.

"Idiots, aren't they?" mutters Ino, sitting next to me and still massaging her fingers. "They make such a huge deal out of nothing."

"Agreed," I reply. I surprise myself. My tone of voice is actually not acidic, rather bored...

She blinks, looks at me, and then turns away. "Sorry about the whole bathroom thing."

I can't deny it; I'm surprised. Apologizing; _her??_

_Is she just testing me? If she is, I'll just go along with the act._

Either way. I say, "That's fine."

A small smile is on her face. "Come one, then," she smiles, "Let's watch them at it."

* * *

I never expected Ino to first break the ice! That just surprises me (sobs).

Neji is so weird:) But no, it's not going to be Neji-Hinata.

Sakura/Kiba/Naruto are going to be in the picture soon, too :D

Lumberrrrrrrrrrrrrrry (is that annoying anyone? myself, for example?!)


	9. My Hair

Neji's so cute...sigh. XD

* * *

Neji and Gaara's wrists are still locked when Gai-sensei booms, "All Champions to the middle!"

Neji pauses. "Let's both go."

Gaara stays laconic, but follows him to the center of the gym, a huge green circle with a mahogany desk.

There are four people already there. Rock Lee, Sakura, Kiba, Chouji. Apparently Kiba and Rock Lee tied; they're glaring at each other like there was no tomorrow.

Surprising and rather interesting.

Ino goes crazy. "Yah, Sakura!" she screams. "Show 'em watch ya got!!"

"Cha!" she grins back, looking at me also.

By the time I figure that it's a good idea to smile back, Gai-sensei was in full bloom.

"Dance of the Spring Youth!" he cries. "We'll start with the lady!"

Apparently there are three rather distinct groups of varying enthusiasm through the participants;

_Excited_: Sakura, Kiba, Chouji

_Bored or just seemingly indifferent_: Neji, Gaara

_Going absolutely crazy_: Rock Lee.

Figures.

"Ladies first, Sakura!" he beams, and looks at her, who gulps. "Twirl in the middle in a perfect circle - show off your youth! - and point a finger. He will be your oppponent!"

"Ah - um, okay."

She does so, falling once out of nervousness. The finger points directly at Kiba.

Akamaru barks, looking excited, and Kiba grins.

I lean closer, interested. I'd never seen either of them in action before.

Sakura smiles, her eyes narrowing, sizing him up. "Too bad your dog can't help you_ now."_

Kiba keeps grinning. "Nor your precious Sasuke," he shoots back.

Two bright flames dance in her eyes. She scowls. "Bring it on!"

"Ready..." - Gai-sensei's smile is huge - "set, GO!" 

Sakura automaticaly squeezes hard. Something seems to crack.

I wince with Kiba. He moves his arm sideways, pushing his limit.

Ino cheers in her stentorian voice. "YEAH SAKURA!" - the only voice in the gym. It echoes.

_Too silent. Just like that night..._

_When my destiny was circled twice._

_Once as the heiress of the Hyuuga clan._

_The other as the bringer of death._

Kiba's squeezing back. She lets him, then turns her arm

and

Voila, his hits the table lightly.

Ouch. Not good for male ego.

But Kiba just grins, stretching. "Good job," he says, and Sakura shakes his hand gingerly, "Tough grip you have."

"Gaara! Chouji!"

They take their places. Chouji has a colossal bag of chips, and he sits ther contentedly, waiting for the "go", munching away.

Glutton.

"Ready...set...GO!!"

It's rather quick. Chouji tries his best, but is pushed down slowly.

Gradually. He can't seem to fight.

"You...lose," comes a voice from Gaara, so hideous it echoes like fingernails against the blackboard.

I tremble. Chouji's hand dangles like a linp fish, plainly broken.

_Limp...that's what Hizashi looked like..my uncle. Limp_

_and dead._

A wave of nausea hits me and I double over. My chest seems to crack - that's why I can't get enough air -

A tap on my shoulder. "Are you okay, Hinata?"

"I'm fine," I snap. The pain increases, but I do not make a sound.

I'm strong. I'm not weak. I can prove myself...just...don't make a noise.

Naruto comes forward, his head slightly turned towards me. A look of concern is on his features.

"Hinata...do you need to see the nurse?"

"N-no."

"You sure?"

I face him, and the pain lessens. "I'm _fine_."

"Okay..." reluctantly he takes his spot behind me. "I'll be checking." His look of severity is ruined by his stupidity.

Right. As if anyone cares about me - as if they want to.

Hiashi does not, taking care of me only because of his role as a father. No other reason. He's made it plain so many times, even kicking me once while I started to cry once in front of him.

_I'm five._

_"Don't be weak, Hinata! You must be strong. If only - " He reaches across, takes my shoulder-length black hair. _

_I'd washed it especially for training, wanting to look my best and practice my hardest. It's futile. " - If only I had a son that was strong!" In one slice his Jyuuken cuts it. I'm left with short, mangly, ear-length hair. "Why can't you be more like Neji?" Turns away, never looks back. "You weakling."_

_I'm left with a bad haircut, a hopeful heart ripped in two, my conscience left in tatters._

_I am No One. Later I cut my hair myself, hoping it would look better if I worked on it. It didn't. My hair is ugly, shorter than a boy's. He has achieved but a bad haircut and I hateful daughter._

_I hate him._

Just the Gai-sensei rants, "Neji and Rock Lee!" A spark lights up in his mouth.

I wonder if Gai-sensei secretly practices cloning himself.

Rock Lee looks exactly like his miniature Gai-sensei, except slightly thinner brows, buggier eyes, and a scrawnier body. He flashes a smile that's the exact and freaking annoying-same. "Hai, Gai-sensei!"

Tear stream down their faces suddenly.

I try not to gag.

"Into the sunset, my pupil!"

"Y-yes, Gai-sensei!"

"Springtime of Y - "

"I'm over here." Neji stands, hands folded across his chest. "Hurry up."

"I - yes, Neji-san! I shall perform my duties," Rock Lee says seriously, tears still streaming down his face. He takes a seat.

"Go, NEJI!" shrieks quite a few girsl.

Neji eyes the crowd. "Shut up." It grows silent. His eyes meet mine, his face holding a guarded expression.

Even with his Byakugan, he manages to seem like he can read my mind, see exactly what I was thinking of just now...

_The death..._

I look away first. Crap.

They lock their hands together, Neji indifferent, Rock Lee determined. (A/N: I can imagine his brows together!!!)

"START!" booms Gai-sensei.

The miniature version starts out strong. He has a killer grip; Neji's tendons show as he struggles.

_So someone can push him that far..._

His hand lowers drastically. A few fangirls gulp.

"You're a failure." Neji's voice, sounding unbroken, untouchable.

Rock Lee ignores him.

It's suddenly gotten silent in the gym.

Neji's hand slips even further. He's sweating.

"Why are you even trying?"

Rock Lee's concetration breaks for an instant, and Neji pushes. Their grip is in the exact middle again.

"Even a hard worker cannot beat a genius." This time his voice sounds strained, but the reaction does not differ.

Rock Lee breathes hard, his eyes widening.

It's difficult to determine who's sweating more. Their grasp stays still, an impasse.

Neji speaks again. "Destinies cannot be changed." He forces his hand down, and he has won.

_Destinies..._

Everything changes to a violent white before I pass out.

* * *

This has got to be my longest chappie ever!

I'm learning :)

Does Hinata still seem OOC? Well, a bit...

God, her first day in school was long! It took more than five chapters (though they're not that long :P)

Bye and happy cookies and chocolate!

Lumberrrrrrrrrrrrrrry


	10. Comfort Zone

I had guests over. They're gone now, and I'm sad...

Did you (readers) ever hear of "Wuthering Heights" by Kate Bush? (the song; it's on Youtube) How is it? I love it; her voice is enrapturing.

Yes. I do still feel sad...

* * *

My eyes crack open to the faces of Ino, Naruto, Sakura, and Kiba. 

Eyelids quickly shut again.

Silently I swallow, and then regret it. My mouth tastes like something the cat dragged in, an old sock.

I try to make my face appear as if I'm in a deep sleep.

"She's awake, Tsunade-sama," informs Kiba immediately. I give him the closed eye evil glare.

_Why can't they leave me alone?_

I can't deny it. A small invisible part of me longs for their friendship. Longs for home.

Something wet cools my forehead.

The familiar vice of Gai-sensei fills the room, sounding very, extremely close, too close for comfort.

"She was right! I should have let her skip that period since she felt sickly…"

Murmur mutter mutter murmur shut up.

I pull the covers over my head. I'm dead. They can't make me get up. I can choose for myself, whether to get up or stay down, dead, defeated.

"She's not injured, but fatigued," Tsunade's voice proclaims for all to hear.

I feel like crap. Crap. I feel like not a human being, not a ninja. I'm too lowly, a speck of dirt on a clean, orderly surface. I swallow again, my throat blistering. Tears sting. Like I have a cold, except without caring parents and mental medicine.

My eyes open slightly when light shines down. Naruto grins, making eye contact.

Ah. Erk. So much for this.

Either way I'm obliged to sit up. So I do, wincing under the stiff red blanket.

"I'm glad you're awake," begins Sakura. "We were – "

"Yeah!" Naruto chimes in, leaning forward. "You looked dead – "

Sakura wallops him but stops, considering. "You…you did. Everyone was…scared…"

_Dead? Death is too far away to even consider._

I've never lost anyone close to me due to the Grim Reaper before. And plus I doubt it's going to happen anytime soon. Life is too calm for that.

I don't care if I really am a psycho, a crazed maniac. Because now… with these strangers staring in sympathy, it's like I _belonged_.

But it doesn't. Because I'm the only one lying in a bed with half a blanket on freezing. I'm the only one who went through several shades of hell before I came to this tiny refuge stop.

I'll be running again in no time.

The problem is, I know that something huge and like an asteroid is going to land on my orbit and knock it out of place. I know. This little comfort zone is to become no more as soon as I step into my house. As soon…then my father will scold me, harangue me, use a long and lengthy diatribe to upbraid me. Ultimate form of killing someone's confidence, just when that confidence has reached a slightly higher level.

Yelling.

I sit up, alert.

A nurse rushes in screaming bloody murder.

As if I care. What? Someone's wounded? A child tripped? Wow. Overreaction big time.

"Ts-tsunade! Shizune! I – I…"

"What is it?" commands our Hokage.

It shouldn't be so important. So important to go directly to Tsunade?

"I - I - um, it's - "

She's so hyped up she can barely get words out.

"Hi-h-h-h – "

"WHAT?!" Now our Hokage is yelling; I can see her eyes become older, wiser, much stronger than a lady in her twenties.

" – d-d – "

Tsunade rushes to her side and forces eye contact. Scary. A lady principal who's glaring at you? "Speak up!"

"H-h-hiashi...h - is d - "

Impossible. The only word I can think of right now is "dead," but that just proves that I need help finding a better word. Decapitated? Most likely not. He's strong. Too strong for an average Jounin. Several Jounin.

Or it could be dormant? He's sleeping? …Well…

Drunk? Rather possible, compared to death.

Drastically altered? Hah. Yeah. Right.

Dumb? Deaf? Still far from possibility.

So I wait, wait, still as a statue, for her response. It comes quickly, probably in fear of Tsunade's wrath.

"D…dead."

* * *

Sorry if it's short. Actually, no...I can't care less. 

I'm sad...some people might call it emo. Most likely not. I also feel weirdly happy, like another chapter of my life has been finished with a fine paintbrush instead of sloppy strokes.

Do I seem insane to you?

And plz review XD

(Anywaaaaaaaaaay) I'll write more next time. Until then, good riddance :)

Lumberry.


	11. Impasse

I'm back at school. It's boring and I feel dead...Yawns.

I got 97 on a math test but also I feel nothing. So I've laughed and cried and smiled and sighed.

Well, review pweaze!! Didn't see that coming? Scratch that; the **ONLY** thing I feel right now is that I want you to review!!!

Disclaimeeer: Neji does not belong to me even though I dream about him every night faithfully from ten to seven!!!

Oh, and I love

**Max the Max Bunny and**

**Julie the Chenille Bunny!!**

* * *

Hiashi is dead. Why didn't I see it coming? 

It's a strange thing to say. Why? Five syllables. Easy, correct?

Hi-a-shi-is-ded.

Hi! Ashi isded.

Hiash iis ded.

Hiashi is dead...

Words mingle, reproduce, and separate in my brain until I have no sense of the past or present. Like a math proof, only worse. Math...the class I used to like. And now it's only the first day of school, I hate it, all hope is gone, and I feel strangely empty.

_Given: Hiashi is dead._

_Prove: Hiashi is not alive_.

My father goes in for Hiashi by the Substitution Property of Equality.

_My father is dead._

Substitute "not alive" in for "dead."

_My father is not alive._

Transitive Property of Equality:

_Hiashi is not alive._

Eyes sting throat itches mouth hurts nose runs.

It's been at least two hours since I sat here.

How should I feel? How should anyone feel. Two hours...

A song may go with it...lyrics to support the funereal tune.

_It's been two hours since my father died,_

_two hours since my friends wait for me,_

_two hours have I sat here,_

_two hours have my bottom ached..._

I crack a smile. It hurts.

The only people left in the dreary hos-prison are Kiba, Ino, and a few bumbling nurses. Sakura had to go for her training.

The nurse that told news about Hiashi probably got a pay raise. Maybe even a promotion. Something good out of something bad, right?

Kiba taps on my shoulder hesitantly. Funny. It never crossed my mind he was the hesitant type. "Hinata...Who are you going to live with now?" His eyes are concerned, his hair slightly hanging over his face.

_If it were anyone else I would just ignore them but it's him...the boy that has the kind eyes and a dog._

Redundant. I don't live. I go to school, go through motions of eating and sitting and drinking. I do not live.

He thinks I can talk.

Ha! Funny. I forgot to laugh. Talk? Laugh? Smile? It's too much. I just sit there, feeling the slight wind rubbing against my feet and trying to memorize and think and wonder how the heck everything went so freaking wrong

it's not sane there has to be

a culprit behind

this.

There's a flash of anger I know that appears in my eyes. I don't know the rest of my expression, but Kiba leans forward, apparently worried. I want to stay close to him, feel his hands brush against my cheek for a sign of tears, but I have forgotten how to cry.

I want someone to care for me.

Someone to express that care. Someone...

_Worried._

My throat hurts. Usually it's something Hiashi is good at understands.

Clap, clap. Give him a prize. He makes a type of Hyuuga tea especially for throat tenketsu and maintaining chakra... Maybe today he'll -

"Y-you could live with me, Hinata," suggests Ino, "My family's relatively s-small. It'll be...easy."

Relatively. Big word for a big mouth.

I wince at my callousness.

But I keep the anger. "I'll live by myself," I mumble.

There's definitely traces of surprise in their eyes. Maybe even sympathy, sympathy,

all I get is sympathy but no empathy.

I don't know how I managed to get home but I do, three minutes later. Maybe I ran, maybe I flew, but either way, the bottom of my jacket is soaked through with dirt, my elbows are scraped badly, knees are actually spitting blood out, and my throat still

hurts like something made of rough cement is scraping against it every time I try to take a breath.

I get home. The silence is so freaking loud it hurts my eardrums. No Hiashi yelling at me. No father. No mother. No family.

I don't feel anything. No pain, no sorrow, no boohoohoo I broke a nail type of thing.

On the brighter side, maybe...

realization _will_ break through, my heart _will_ stop, and I _will_ die tomorrow.

I run up to my room, slam the door, manage to break the hinges, and scream into my blankets.

* * *

How was that? Review or email me!! 

I hope you're sorry for Hinata, but there's a bright side;

the Chuunin exams are soon!! And let me tell you Hinata's in it :)

Also, she's vey (very very) depressed so it might be boring...

but keep at it!! ;D

Lumberrrrrry


	12. Dinner with Kiba

**I'm on a roll!!!**

That may be good or bad.

Bad: Bouncing off and breaking walls and shattering glass with my opera singing.

Good: ... -Let me think about that- runs away and never comes back.

Well I have great ideas!! But I'm not going to share them with you!!

Heck, just _READ_!

**

* * *

**

**November 5,** Year of the Crescent Moon

I haven't spoken at all since two months ago. Possibly more, less, I don't know. My eyes hurt constantly, I don't make eye contact much. Grades take a huge nosedive, my social life is once again reduced to negative one, and even Naruto has stopped trying to get me to speak.

Chuunin exams are tomorrow, people crowding in clumps at school whispering and yelling excitedly, evidently thinking they'll win.

Just another hope to be crushed.

In the morning, I sit on the log as usual, not saying anything, watching Akamaru catching fireflies. I'm placed in a group with Shino and Kiba. Lucky me. They stopped asking me to practice training ten days ago.

I don't care. I'm weak. I do not sign up for the exams, and my very own teammates probably hate my guts.

After a few more minutes of pointless training, Shino leaves for some bug catching expedition, and Kiba comes to sit next to me like he always does. As usual, I don't speak. Don't ackowledge.

Only this time he doesn't stay silent.

"Hinata," he says, bending down slightly to meet my eyes, "you should train."

I don't respond. Hypnotized, I watch his eyes; they're a deep, dark onyx.

What am I doing? It's not him, it's not anyone, it's my fault, my fault entirely. I can't live up to this. It's better to stay invisible.

Down goes my eyes. I never noticed that the bottom of my sneakers are gray.

"After all, you're in the Chuunin exams."

A side of his mouth quirks up as I glance at him. _Chuunin exams?!_ That's impossible. I didn't sign up. I never did! And I never train.

Only plausible theory; he's crazy.

I study him. His eyes are teasing, but only on the surface. The smirk rapidly grows as my expression turns slowly into a horrified one. _What_! If this is a joke to make me talk, it won't work.

I clamp my mouth shut and look away, acutely aware of his gaze. How...what...no, it's not...

Pretty soon he gets Akamaru and ambles off, but not far away to be out of earshot. "Be there tomorrow at nine o'clock! That's when it starts."

Now I'm annoyed.

I run up as he slows down, and he shoots me a smile. Shoot me dead.

"What up with you?" The voice is clear and aggressive, intent on speaking out.

"Talking again?" he asks shrewdly, his eyebrows raised.

By the time I figure it's my voice that spoke, my words are already out, jumbled but still in an understandable pace, "How did you - I didn't sign up for the Chuunin exams! You - "

"It was easy." He pauses, his grin both interesting and annoying.

"I don't care." Now that the words are out, it's easy to talk, to communicate. I walk faster, and he matches my pace easily.

"I used my Jujin Bunshin to change Akamaru into myself, then the Transformation Jutsu to transform me into you. Akamaru, Shino, and I appeared to be Team 8." Apparently he's proud of his idea, "We went to Kurenai-san and I said that I'd changed my mind, except since I was you, so - " He pauses, and Akamaru barks happily to match his mood. His grin is getting on my nerves. "Ingenious, no?"

I don't know if it's the result of me clamming up for two months hibernating, his grin, or that his plan _was_ clever, but I hit his arm. "Kiba! I'm not _ready_ for this!"

"Ah, that's easily fixed." He turns towards me, Akamaru now yipping merrily. "We'll start training right now!"

* * *

At eight o'clock, we had been training for nine hours straight. 

Without lunch.

I think my legs are going to kill me if my sore shoulders don't.

"You have good speed," Kiba pants, getting his coat and putting it on. "Get the kunais - I'll get the shurikens."

I deactivate my Byakugan, breathing heavily; the only thing holding my arms up is my knees.

"Got a workout?"

I wipe sweat off my face. I can't believe that I'd ever thought today was cold. Heat is literally radiating off of my forehead. "Yeah..."

I pick up his kunais, pulling them from the ground. They're embedded deeply - the ones deepest are his, shallowest mine - and I have difficulty pulling them like weeds in a garden.

Akamaru holds three in his mouth, somehow still managing to bark. His tail wags, tiredly but cheerfully. I take the weapons, murmuring a thanks. He yips and I hand the kunais, now dented and bent, to Kiba.

We walk back to town, the dog in his hair, three safe and rather wary feet between us. After a few minutes, I see and hear bright lights and busy streets. (A/N: Respectively, of course. )

The Ichiraku Ramen Bar is shining and brightly lit, looking the most promising. "Hinata? Want to...?"

"Yeah...I'm hungry." Usually I skip lunch and don't eat much anyhow; my allowance is down to a thousand yen (A/N: I think it's about ten US dollars. If I'm wrong please tell me!! Love Lumberry).

Unsurprisingly, Naruto is there, at least three bowls stacked to his left. "Hinata! I didn't expect..." Naruto stops eating and starts talking, his mouth full of ramen. "Are you okay? Are you - were you _training_? You look so tired! Chuunin exams start tomorrow - are you ready?!"

Curse him for reminding me. "Uh - yeah...not really - "

"Give it a rest, Naruto," growls Kiba, and then turns to Teuchi, the ramen shop manager. "Two bowls topped with everything," he orders, slipping off his jacket.

I try not to notice his thin shirt. "Kiba, I don't..." I finger my cash, handing it to Teuchi. "I hope this is enough - "

"That's fine," cuts in Naruto. "I'll pay, since you're finally talking!"

"Hey, forgot about me? _I_ will," declares Kiba. "Besides, it's my fault she's so tired."

Naruto's glance turns into a glare. "I was only trying to - "

"Hey, hey!" interrupts Ayame, the assistant. She pushes back my money with kind eyes. "It's our treat. You guys are just nervous for tomorrow."

I mouth a thanks, but inwardly I'm rebelling. _Another_ reminder!

I hate it. As if I'm already not anxious, not worried.

Pretty soon Teuchi comes back, managing two bowls in each crooks of his arm, and one on his head. "Eat up," he instructs, and then goes to wash dishes.

The two boys are stunned, I see.

I'm too hungry to question the power of the stomach.

I dig in, cramming ramen into my mouth.

* * *

Naruto finishes first and leaves, bidding farewell and good luck tomorrow and won't I meet him at the ramen shop at nine o'clock? 

I don't answer, either because I'm seriously annoyed by the mentions to the Chuunin exam or that I'm busy ripping up narutos.

By now it's already ten o'clock.

Finally I sip up the last of my noodles and wipe my mouth, feeling full for the first time mentally and physically.

"I'll walk you home," Kiba offers.

Kindness. That's something he can afford to give away without asking anything back.

Friendship...

Something I _can't_ do.

I shake my head no, feeling strangely sad. Emotions build up slowly, and I just want to cry. Thoughts drift into my head, and I fight the urge to sob and wail like a baby.

Kiba...I can't be your friend.

I have nothing to give, nothing to say, no love, no hate.

He's going to be horribly disappointed when he finds out how awful I really am.

That I don't feel anything for Hiashi's death. I don't care for anyone else...

That my kindness has evaporated and I'm thoughtlessly drifting inside.

That I wish he'd leave me alone so he doesn't get hurt and save him from unhappiness.

I walk away from him, trying to ignore his guarded look.

_...That I wish we could be friends in another lifetime where my life isn't twisted and that I can find it easier to love_...

* * *

My longest chappie!! Or sort of, anyhow!! 

I'm tired, but undefeated!! Fwahuahua :P

I just got new rubber bands for my braces (yes, I am a victim of the braces).

I chose blue!!!

PS Don't forget to review!!

But then again, my saying is:

A Watches Review does not come.

Lumberrrrrrrrrrrry


	13. The Dark and Mysterious One

**YAY!!** I love the Chuunin exams, and I have a different viewpoint on it :)

I can't believe I managed to find time to write this But then again, I'm procrastinating for my Math Extra Credit as well...

Happy Early-Christmas, anyhow :P

Disclaimer: I don't own Neji. No, I don't. I don't want to. He is free like a bird

Neji: Fate cannot be changed.

Me: Yes it can!!

Neji: Fate cannot be changed.

Me: ... gives up.

**

* * *

**

**November 6, **Year of the Crescent Moon

_- 8:03 in classroom for an announcement -_

Morino Ibiki stands in front of us, looking menacing, jagged with his multiple scars, and...stupid.

He's been standing there for at least ten minutes; the act has long been old now, waiting for the last Genin to arrive.

Finally, Naruto stumbles in, looking positively small next to the teacher's towering frame.

"UZUMAKI NARUTO!"

He blinks sleepily, rubbing his eyes. His socks are mismatched, his jacket is obviously backwards, and his hair is tousled...untidily but yet still boyishly... "W-what?!"

"Sit down." It's a voice that can make anyone pee in their pants, but not me; I've figured the voice is just another mask to frighten students into behaving. Sure enough, though, it works.

Naruto gulps and hurries to sit next to me. "Scary, huh?"

There's suddenly a whirlwind before I can speak. Iruka appears, tall and lean like always. "I've come to explain the Chuunin exams!" he announces, and glances at Morino Ibiki. The scarier of the two nods in understandment, and disappears.

Iruka clears his throat. "As you may know by now, the Chuunin exams are today. There are too many to become a Chuunin, so this exam is used solely for the process of elimination.

Short Chuunin exam explanation: these are held twice every year. You must have completed at least eight missions and a satisfactory acceptance from the Jounin in which you were assigned it. There are other villages participating to see how we may improve our skills...This year the Sound village and a number of other smaller villages will not be in the Chuunin exams. The villages are Konoha, the Sand village, and one exchange student from the Waterfall village." (A/N: I just thoughts that sounded cool exchange student...waterfall...)

Iruka takes a breath.

"Every few years the rules are changed to match the levels of Genin. This year there are, instead of three, seven parts," he announces, and then continues without pausing,

"We choose partners for each of you to help with motivation and competition. You will participate in these seven tasks solely with your partner. Judges will write down and score for both of you in speed, endurance, technique, skill, etc - At the end we will tally up each of your scores, and whoever has made the seventy point cut will be made a Chuunin.

The most anyone can receive in one part is ten points; the seventh and final part differs and you may get bonus points. So while a normal Genin may have, say, fifty points, the Genin who stand out will have more points. But then again, it's possible no one is to be proved profficient enough for a Chuunin."

He looks up from the paper. I notice his face is slightly blue. "Any questions?"

I stay silent, my stomach feeling strangely empty, yet full.

Nnbody raises a hand, and he continues.

"Partners are as follows. This ordering is completely random.

Shino Aburame, TenTen;

Shikamaru Nara, Temari;

Chouji Akimichi, Naruto Uzumaki;

Kiba Inuzuka - "

"Are they our partners for the whole exam?" Rock Lee calls out.

Iruka stops listing the names and nods. "The whole thing."

"Thank you, Iruka-sensei!"

I detect a slight roll of the eyes before Iruka continues, this time with a tired air, and I lean forward.

_Kiba...Kiba and who?_ I feel like screaming, wondering -

"Kiba Inuzuka and Sakura Haruno..."

I sit back, feeling somber and my heart seems to stop. _Why...? Why do I feel..._

"...Hinata Hyuuga, Sasuke Uchiha;

Neji Hyuuga, Gaara;

Kankurou, Rock Lee;

Ino Yamanaka, Yumeki Etsuko."

_Sasuke?!_

"At precisely nine o'clock you will meet at the main gate with your partner." Iruka surveys the room, and then finally puts away his cursed paper.

"Dismissed."

After a few seconds of digesting the news, I parade after the class in a single file. Lucky Hinata... Sasuke stands behind me.

He just _stands_ and sort of _stares, _like he's examining something or focused. I have a feeling that if I wave a hand in front of his eyes, he won't respond.

* * *

_- 8:46 -_

It's about half an hour later when I walk out of my house dressed in layers. I know I'm nervous.

I was so hyped up on training yesterday. So intent on becoming stronger...surer...

Smarter...

More confident...

But now it's just a waste of time! I know I'm never going to become a Chuunin. Curse Kiba...but then again, as soon as I get this over, I'll just know never to participate in this kind of thing again.

"Oy, Hinata!" Blond hair flashes besides me. "Are you going to the main gate?"

"Baka," I reply, slowing my pace to match his more leisure one. "Of course."

"Yeah...sorry." He places his hands behind his neck, his elbows out. I notice that his jacket is worn correctly, his socks match, and his hair is somewhat more under controlled.

Somehow I liked it messy.

"Who's your partner?"

I see Ino up ahead, and instinctively lower my voice. "It's Sasuke." I make it as quiet as humanly psosible, but Ino hears.

"SASUKE?! Lucky you!!"

She joins us as Naruto makes a retort. "_Lucky?!_ No _way!_" He turns to glare at Ino. "He doesn't _deserve_ a partner! Besides," he adds, his nose wrinkling, "He'll just get in the way." His beautiful cerulean eyes squint.

A loud _oomph_ escapes his lips. "Owwww!"

Sakura comes next to me, the farthest place from Ino. "_Don't_ badmouth Sasuke, will you, Naruto? He's a - "

"He's an idiot is what he is," mutters Naruto.

Sakura raises her hand again and Naruto cringes right on cue, just as Sasuke steps out of his house.

"Sasuke!" Ino sees him first. Talks to him, walks with him, flirts with him first.

"How are you doing?!"

I barely hear his reply as he walks on. "Fine without you."

Ino's face is considerably more vulnerable, but she smiles forcefully. "Tha-that's fine."

She stays quiet and waits for us. Sasuke doesn't once look back.

_If this is all an act to make me scared of him, it's not working._

_It just increased my determination._

Sympathetic countenances await as Ino tries not to look at us.

Sakura is the first to break the silence. "Um...H-how's your cousin, Hinata?"

I shoot her the bird, and her eyes are full of apology and necessity. "He's fine."

"Erm, yeah...he's strong, right? I mean, he actually won the arm-wrestling thing out of all of us..."

Her voice trails off, and she half-smiles. "Well, I better go to Kiba..."

She doesn't know how utterly lucky she is to have a partner who actually has emotions, who cares for others. Capable of kindness and caring...

Pretty soon Naruto leaves to look for Chouji, and Ino sighs. "Nervous?"

"Yeah."

"Well, good luck, Hinata."

She scrutinizes the crowd. "There - that's Yumeki. I - I'd better go."

She hurries off, averting my eye contact.

So it's me alone.

I'm stuck on a search for Sasuke, the Dark and Mysterious One.

* * *

After a few moments I find him; his dark clothes easily in contrast with the other Genin. He's standing below a huge, crooked tree just out of Konoha's boundaries. Plus his arms are folded and his eyes look like they might just kill anyone standing in his way.

Nice try to intimidate me. But no.

You know I'm here.

As I walk steadier, calmer, surer, his eyebrows raise slightly. Did he expect at least this much from me, the Weird Girl?

"Good luck."

* * *

Yay Hinata!

Yay Sasuke...

**YAY NEJI!!**

Somehow the varying levels of enthusiasm are scaring me, too :C

Well, cross your fingers for Hinata and NEJI!!!!

Lumberrrrrrrrrrry


	14. Tests One, Two, Three

Without a doubt! W/o a d!!

This is my FAV chapter!! (says myself)

It has 2688 words!!! Proud of meeself :)

Well, I don't know how I've been progressing (coughs VERY loudly cough - review - cough!) so I hope you like it, but...

**Disclaimer of Disclaimers:** _A-ahem_. Neji does not belong to me because of a certain Kishimoto... But at least I can keep my dreams of that pale-eyed ninja (sticks tongue out).

(Transforms into Hinata) Okay, here's Chapter Fourteen!!!!!!

* * *

Ewcks. In just a few minutes of waiting, the speaker goes up to the podium and yells. It's Gai-sensei. It _has_ to be Gai-sensei, right? ...and his clone. 

Shine goes their luminous, glow-in-the-dark teeth. Too bad we'd get punished for stealing their toothpaste or dyeing their hair pink or whatever.

"Genins!" the green-suited Jounin literally screams. "Part one is a test of speed and velocity! The rules are simple!" Almost everyone has their hands crammed next to their throbbing eardrums, except for...

Rock Lee stands within a five-foot radius and still manages to smile.

"You will run by foot only on ground! Half a mile (A/N: I first typed "smile"! Loz.) out of Konoha, then turn around. We have marked the trees at the place to symbolize your stoppage and turn-aroundage! Four sets of partners will run at one time, so there will be two groups that run in total!

The judges will be in the trees, watching - any technique of any type or kind is not allowed. You may not activate abilities such as Byakugan or Sharingan. This race determines your knowledge as a runner and solely a runner." He breathes, and affords to grin with a twinkle.

"First group:

Neji, Gaara, Naruto, Chouji, Ino, Yumeki, Shikamaru, Temari!

Take your places!"

They do so, still as rocks.

"GO!!"

In the blink of an eye, they're all gone, and the wind whips through the trees like a farewell hymn.

I think I'm too bored to be worried. My partner still stays as taciturn as ever. Too bored, boring...

Oh, well. It's not like it's my funeral or anything. I walk over to where Sakura, Kiba, Rock Lee, and TenTen are.

"It's gonna be a loooong wait," yawns Sakura. She places a hand over her mouth, sits down.

"No, it won't be." Opposed to the tomboyish demeanor, TenTen has a rather sweet and high voice. "They go _really_ fast. Especially Neji."

Why do I feel like rolling my eyes?

Since no one replies, TenTen adds, "He's the strongest and fastest. He's sure to win!"

- "Yes, that is true, but only if he is goal-oriented," throws in Rock Lee, "and motivated by the other Genin in which he is racing."

Kiba shoots me a look, his eyebrows raised, and then turns to him. "That's crap. This is the _Chuunin exams_. They don't need anything but their determination."

TenTen's back, obviously upset by Rock Lee's interruption. "Either way, _Neji_ is going to win."

She leans in, preparing to deliver a sermon about the qualities my cousin possesses.

"He's strong and fast and he will beat..."

Slowly but surely, this girl is annoying the heck out of me.

Once again, I feel like talking. So I do.

"What if you're _wrong? _Have you ever considered that? What if Neji's losing and he's not so great and he's a - " 'Pervert' comes in to my mind first, and unthinkingly I spit it out, - "pervert and looks good only because of - " 'Makeup stays lodged in my brain, and I babble on - "makeup and even though he's a guy so no one notices?"

I didn't know what I just said, and I don't exactly want to, since their reactions vary from amusement (Kiba), shock (Rock Lee), surprise (Sakura), and anger (TenTen).

"Don't you go saying - "

I open my mouth to shut her up, but Gai-sensei interrupts. "We're seeing them...fifty yards away!" His eyes are above his thick brows, and he's squinting. "Group Two, take your places!"

A cruel and agonizing wind rides through my short hair, feeling like a thousand tiny needles embedded into my skin. _Not now..._

So it's my turn. It's my turn and my teammates. I wait, one side Kiba, another Sasuke. I wish I could say I'm glad and happy as this moment comes to pass, but I'm just not. I'm not fit for this. I never was.

"Can I still take a rain check?" I whisper to Kiba, while Gai-sensei stands craning his neck, waiting.

Kiba grins. I can see every eyelash, he's that close. "Too late, Hinata."

"It's all your fault if I'm dead last!" I hiss back, facing front again.

"Aw, shut up. You're just nervous."

"You shut up."

Beside me, Sasuke's looking ahead, as serious as serious may get. God. It's like the Chuunin exams are more than...just an _exam_ for him.

I could have sworn his head was tilted towards me one heartbeat before.

A loud stampede rushes in, the first thing I see is Gaara and Neji, clearly in the lead.

Dust swirls up; sand, gravel, dirt - hopefully it won't happen to me - and Gaara emerges, victorious. After him, looking furious, is Neji.

What happened? He looks...defeated.

My eyebrows rise slightly. And what's up with the hostile competition?

"Team Two! Take your places!

Ready!" says Gai-sensei.

We - the seond group - all stiffen like bolts of electricity are shot through us. I feel my heart going berserk, my mouth dry.

"Relax, Hinata. You'll be fine."

"I - "

"Set...Go!!"

A flurry of wind, leaves, and clothes, and we're off.

I don't know what happens next - I'm focused to running fast I have no idea, no sight, of what's happening around me. Pretty soon I'm six yards beyond the marked trees.

_Crap!_

I turn around - hurry, hurry! - and build up speed.

I can't concentrate, can't _move_ fast enough, can't hear if the others are catching up or not -

Come one, you! Just...relax.

A clearing rips open before me and I enter, feeling absurdly happy of the sunshine spilling on my face.

Run - hurry -

"Hinata Hyuuga, first place!" Gai-sensei bellows, looking positively constipated. Another rustle of dirt and dust; "Sasuke, Rock Lee, Kiba, TenTen! Close but not enough!! Any more? ...Sakura, Kankurou, Shino!"

I can't catch my breath fast enough, lying in a heap on the ground, winded.

Two hands force me up. "Good job, Hinata!" I know the voice. It's Naruto. "You won!"

I can't talk, so I cough instead, the Genin babbling and talking as loud and as annoying as they can get.

_If this is hell it sure is noisy.__

* * *

_

We're only given five minutes to recuperate. I can't seem to inhale oxygen. Kiba hands me a bottle of water, which I forcefully gulp down. I won, maybe, but I still feel like crap. To prove myself...what am I doing? I don't need to... It's all for naught. I don't feel any different. No difference...

"You okay, Hinata?" _his_ voice again; the blond ninja's.

"_No_," I snap back, irritated. "I'm fine. Why won't I be? I've run a mile and now I'm exhausted!"

"I - was j - "

"Second Test!"

It's not Gai-sensei this time; it's a female's voie; loud, strong, and full of authority. Even I'm compelled to look up.

"I am Mitarashi Anko!"

She's wearing only a long jacket that's zipped tightly, but it's less than minimal protection for such a sunny yet cruel and windy day.

"The Second Test is one of endurance and strength!" she yowls. "You will go with your partner on your turn into the clearing and assume the position like you would for a pushup. Teachers will place blocks of stone on your backs. Each block will lie on your back for ten seconds, then another if you can handle it, and so on. If, say, it's your second block and you only reach seven seconds, the number of points you get will be one - one point for completion. If you get over ten the extra points are counted.

The more blocks you can endure, the more points you will receive - the stronger you are.

Got that?"

As a group of sixteen Genin, the "Hai" is sadly pathetic.

"Very well. Since all of you are so _enthusiastic_ - " her dark eyes flash and her mouth curves upwards - "We will begin now!"

Our groans exceed the noise of any sound we've made so far. Sakura sighs, "But we just finished!"

"That's too bad. You still have enough energy!

Since there are eight pairings, we might as well begin...

First group: Ino and Yumeki!"

It's over in less than a minute. The two kunoichi both buckle at the third block of stone.

_Ouch_. The blocks look heavy...

"TenTen and Shino!"

TenTen falls first, a four-blocker. Shino manages eight - barely.

"Sasuke, Hinata!"

Why is it me? Why can't they forget? All my life...it's about remembering...

I lie on the ground, feeling idiotic, absorbing the gazes that everyone has one us and feeling the cool grass under my palms.

The first block is placed gingerly. I feel my legs grow stiff, straight.

Ten seconds...

Second block sends a whoosh of air through my throat. My legs slide down a few inches...

Third one. It's so heavy; my hands are making deep indents in the soil. Sweat is literally pouring off my face.

Fourth... Why don't I give up? It's like I'm rooted in the position. Tears collect in my eyes.

Fifth; it wasn't that hard for Shino, was it? He didn't give up; I'm doing fine. I can match his strength!

Six.

On second thought, I really can't. The world tips over as my shoulders hit the ground. It's easy, lying there.

Carefully the blocks are removed.

"Hinata; five."

Sasuke keeps on going; I lie there, exhausted, while everyone watches him.

Seven...ten...twelve...thirteen -

On the fourteenth he gracefully bends down in defeat. Thirteen. More than half of my score and the best so far. The tears that had rolled down my face are dry now; my turn's over and I don't want another chance.

"Temari, Shikamaru!"

Now it's going by too fast. Why wasn't it this rapid during my turn? I could endure longer, surely.

Temari has a seven. She's stronger than she looks; and Shikamaru has a six.

"Kiba and Sakura."

There names sound fitting next to each others', somehow. Kiba manages a twelve, Sakura a six.

"Neji...Gaara!"

All of a sudden now we're all alert, watching as the best of the Genin compete with each other. They stay sturdy the whole time, not flinching, not wincing, not grimacing. Made of the same material as the blocks - stone-hard with raw strength.

Neji comes to sixteen before his hair flops down along with his arms; Gaara the same.

"Rock Lee, Kankurou." Excitement gradually slows down as the green guy does a fourteen, Kanakurou twelve.

After that enthusiasm drifts apart and they all grumble about oh why couldn't they rested longer, they'd have done better, complain wail whine sob. The two of us - pale-eyed, pale-skinned - stay silent.

* * *

Another teacher for the Third Test. It's Kakashi-sensei, the dog man. 

"The Third Test..." he says, extremely quiet compared to the previous two teachers, "is the Best Jutsu Test. It's easy...even the stupidest ninja can get the rules..." I notice that Naruto looks a bit too relieved, and surprising even myself, I flash him a reassuring smile. He shoots one back. _Thanks_.

"...you perform...your best jutsu...on my clone..."

Eyes are rolling everywhere and we actually want to get the show on the road.

"Judges will...judge...on your best jutsu.

Any...questions?"

Shake shake impatient. No, no, hurry up.

"No...?" We actually shake our heads this time. "...That's fine." He takes out a book, leaving Gai-sensei to yell out the partners.

"Number one: TenTen! Number two: Shino!"

TenTen does a dance; of Rising Twin Dragons to be exact. I'm not exactly impressed. It _looks_ easy enough. The clone of Kakashi disappears.

"Kikaich no Jutsu." I've never heard his voice before; it's as weird and mysterious as Shino himself. The jutsu sounds cool enough, and the result is a poofed clone and millions of bugs.

"Number Three!!

Sakura and, and Number Four; Kiba!"

On Sakura's face is a desire to prove herself. "Hai...here goes!"

She quickly does both a clone jutsu and a substitution jutsu, just on the safe side. Her chakra control is perfect. The five Sakuras quickly pummel Kakashi into the dust.

The judges are murmuring. Combined jutsu? It's not unheard of, but for Genin...it's tough.

Sakura's sure to receive a high grade. I'm slightly envious myself.

"Jinju Konbi Henge; Sotoro!"

A cloud of dust, and then emerges a huge, double-headed wolf.

I shrink back in fear. _That's...that's Kiba?! The boy with the dog?! Transformed...into..._

Kakashi's clone is pathetic and ripped into shreds. Another gathering of dust, and Kiba is left standing with a smirking Akamaru (A/N: If dogs smirk, well, they look like it sometimes!).

"Good, Inuzuka!" announces our sensei. "Up next...Number Five; Temari, Number Six; Shikamaru!"

The clone is beaten quickly by both; Temari just snaps her wrist (Kamaitachi no Jutsu!) and Shikamaru uses clones. Not as effective, but it works as well.

Gai-sensei is on a rant; I know it. He doesn't stop yelling. "Number Seven: Naruto - Number Eight, Chouji!"

No one's ready for what Naruto does - with blinding speed and power. Quickly he makes a clone and draws a pulsating blue orb - ramming it into the clone's stomach. The force is so big that it dents two trees.

"W-wow..." I utter, completely amazed. Talk about _astonishing_.

"Nikudan Senshan!" Chouji roars in his bellow. In goes his limbs - squash goes Kakashi's clone.

"Number Nine; Neji. Ten is Gaara!"

Silently Neji takes his place, facing the unsuspecting, book-reading Kakashi clone. "Hakke Hyaku Nijuhachi Sho." And then he becomes a force of extreme power. The clone is injured fatally on the seventeenth hit but Neji keeps on going - "One hundred twenty eight."

Gaara goes without a second to spare. "Sabaku Kyu." comes the voice that I know will send shivers up my spine. Everything about him is aloof - dark eyes, quiet manner, bloodthirsty hand. He envelopes the clone in a circular sand barrier. Even before it dissipates I know the clone is already gone, dead. _Deceased_.

"Number Ten: Sasuke! Number Eleven: Hinata."

I know after Sasuke's performance all the Genin will be dissapointed by mine. It'll look to weak, too out of place.

A flash of dark electric blue, a yell of "Chidori!", and his sensei's clone is blown to smithereens. Sasuke takes his place under the tree, looking unruffled.

"...Hinata?"

Um, okay. I...

I know everyone is staring at me. It's all here or now. _Nothing else matters._

"J-Jyuuken!" I stammer, and hit my right hand above his shoulder blade. I missed the vital spot slightly, and hit a second time. To my relief it hits the mark, but I know I've done horribly anyhow. Finally the clone vanishes.

"Number Twelve; Ino!"

...And so it goes on. I can't concentrate, can't move to meet anyone's gaze. Not that anyone would want to look at someone like me.

_What's the use? The first test was just lucky - beginners' luck is what is was...the following tests will just make me look bad..._

I've crawled out of my shell, finally, but there's stormy skies up ahead, I _know_ it, and I want to crawl back in.

* * *

That has to be the longest ever chapter in the whole Hall of Fame Chapters of Lumberry!! 

I mean, really!! I'm starting to get the hang of this :P

Now if only more people reviewed (hint, hint).

Happy Early-Christmas! It's snooooooowing!! (well, no, but.)

Lumberry


	15. The Mark on His Neck

I just thought of "eighth grade" for Hinata. Technically it's simply the "eighth year of practicing techniques." Hinata, like most others, started at age six, so right now she's fourteen (not thirteen like our world). I want a little change is all. ;P

**Review** or else!! And I love Neji.

* * *

"Test Number Four...is the Test of Evasiveness!" It's Gai-sensei again. Tsunade should really hire better teachers. "We will test you in four groups - each group has two sets of partners. This test is one of utter concentration, so we will hold the tests at the same time and there will be a twenty-yard space between each of the four groups. 

One partner will be dodging needles, the other will be throwing shurikens or kunais in front. You may choose who does which job!

The focus is that the partner who dodges needles _may not get hit to receive a perfect score!_ The other partner must sacrifice all to achieve this Springtime goal!

This Test is my faaaaavorite! It shows...teamwork and compassion!"

Teamwork, yes. Compassion? It's added to simply make him sound professional...

"Group Number One:

Hinata Hyuuga, Sasuke Uchiha, Kiba Inuzuka, Sakura Haruno."

_So I'm with him. At least not with Neji or...Gaara._

"Second Group:

Ino Yamanaka, Yumeki Etsuo, Gaara, Neji Hyuuga."

_Good luck, Ino. You'll need it._ She looks both excited and anxious.

"The Third Group is

Naruto Uzumaki, Chouji Akimichi, TenTen, and Shino Aburame."

_I hope you do well, Naruto._

"And the last...but not least! - Group Four is:

Temari, Shikamaru Nara, Rock Lee, and Kankurou.

Group One stays here with me," - Rock Lee is visibly upset - , "and Kakashi, Kurenai, and Iruka will lead the other three groups to other areas of the forest."

Group by group they go, leaving behind a lonely and abandoned feeling.

"I'll dodge the needles," I say to Sasuke, who doesn't respond. "Are you...good at weapons?"

"Possibly."

So he talked, huh.

Well, it was now or never. I stand within range of Gai-sensei's aim of blunt needles, Sasuke a few feet in front of me. "We'll record how many needles hit you," says a judge with a large beard. "Your sensei will throw for three minutes."

Lovely. A time limit like a cherry tops off an ice-cream sundae.

"Ready?"

We nod, tensing.

The needles come from everywhere at one. It's suddenly a forest of blunted shards of wood that flies at impossible speeds.

Three immediately hit me - leg, arm, stomach - with little impact, but it makes Sasuke feel compelled to yell. "God, Hinata! Keep dodging!"

His mastery of the weapons is perfect while I flounder. Tens of hundreds of needles fall to the ground, lifeless. He's looking graceful and working hard while I'm forced to swerve from side to side in what has to be the stupidest test of all.

No wonder it's Gai-sensei's favorite...

There's a note of hysteria in my yell as two more needles simultaneously hit my forehead Another hits the corner of my eye - it hurts -

_Byakuga - duh!_

Sasuke's bloodline limit is already activiated and I do so, too.

The rest is extremely simple.

There's a large volley of needles at the end, but I duck down easily and nothing makes contact. If only I'd activated it earlier...

But it's too late; damage has been done.

"Ten," announces the judge. "Ten needles."

Kiba and Sakura step out from the trees - they weren't allowed to watch us, for the prevention of breaking our concentration.

I sit down in the grass a few yards away. To my surprise, Sasuke sits next to me and starts to talk.

"You should have used your Dojutsu before getting hit," he says in a low voice, facing me.

I stay defensive but I don't apologize. "I know."

"Well," he sorts of sighs, " Good job anyhow. You didn't do bad."

Before I can respond - no, _recover_ - he reaches up and collects two pieces of wood from my hair. Then he falls silent again, looking away and twirling the wood between his fingers, and I'm not keen on talking, either, so we both wait in prolonged silence.

Pretty soon Sakura and Kiba emerge among a rustle of leaves. Sakura has her clothes and her hair adorned with needles - they're sticking out like a porcupine's bad hair day.

Kiba is breathing hard. There are a handful of needles in his grasp. He sits down next to me without one word, and takes off his jacket, looking cross.

Sakura sits on the other side of Sasuke, her eyes tense and deliberately not looking her partner's way.

A corner of my mouth curves upward into half a smile, but I don't know why.

* * *

Luckily it's Kurenai-san who's talking. 

We're all clustered in a small spot maybe a mile out of Konoha, next to a medium-sized deep blue lake.

"The Fifth Test is of Chakra Control," she reports in a clear, rather clipped tone. "You will walk on and across Konoha Lake. It's not far. If you perform perfectly it's a ten-pointer. Mess up less than three times is a five. Otherwise, it's a zero."

No questions are asked.

"You'll all perform at the same time. It's twelve o'clock now. After this Test, we will provide lunch.

Judges will be watching in numerous places. Do not use any techniques.

Good luck."

Since there's nothing more to say, we line up on the side of the lake, Sasuke and Gaara on either side of me.

"Begin. You may take your time."

I palce a timid foot down, and promptly land in the water.

_I - I'm..._

Water clogs my senses - I'm forced up by two iron grips. Wet and shivering, I crawl up to land.

_I'm a fool to think I could do this. Idiot. Idiot. IDIOT!_

A hand sweeps back my hair. "You okay?"

"I-I'm fine."

My partner takes my clammy arm. "Come on."

"N-no."

"Hinata, try again."

"No!"

He sighs. "I'm going, okay? And you have to also. We're having lunch on the other side."

I take a look around - most Genin are already towards the middle of the lake. "See? Hurry up."

"I - I...okay." Looks like I have little choice. Again.

"I'll wait," probes Sasuke. "I'll go after you. I got your back."

I take a tentative step into the water, testing it now It holds my weight, to my utter and complete relief.

"She said to take our time, after all."

"...Okay." I walk with slow, gradual steps. In the middle of the lake the water is difficult to stand on, and I practically inch my way. One inch...two...three. I'm still nervous, still wondering, still wet...

A few more earthworm steps -

I hear a surprised yell and a splash of water behind me.

"Sasuke!!"

Kurenai immediately flies in, water making dark shapes as she plunges into the depths below.

One of the judges heartlessly calls to me, "Hinata Hyuuga, keep on going!"

I don't want to. I want to stay and help Sasuke - somehow, somehow -

To see his face and that he's okay. _It's because of me that he..._

But for the time being...

Deep breaths. I arrive wet and teeth-chattering to the other side where they bombard me with an avalanche of questions. "I - I don't know."

I manage to both escape the crowd and stay keen on watching the lake.

A few more silent, subdued minutes pass until a shape emerges - soaked to the bone, Kurenai carries a limp and wet-haired Sasuke to us; even after that ordeal she can run on water, though she stumbles several times.

A flash of sunlight gleams - there is a dark, distinct mark on Sasuke's neck.

* * *

After a quite and sullen lunch of rice and shrimp without Sasuke, we're sent home after working our butts off, not receiving a single "Thank you," or "Good job." Test Seven begins tomorrow morning at eleven o'clock. 

Us Genin trail and pave our different lives and ways as we head towards our homes. It's started.

I can feel it. Since the day that I've entered eighth grade - the eighth year of becoming or studying ninja techniques, that is - I've bonded with others, smiled, teased, and even laughed.

The Chuunin exams, I know, will split those ways. It will carve several more paths for others to travel on...alone.

It's inevitable - already begun.

Already I've seen the powers, the unexpected fervor, when Naruto fights with Rasengan. I've seen the determination of Kiba and Akamaru.

...The cool and detached expression Sasuke always keeps - like a full-fledged ninja...

...And the cruel and unrelelenting eyes of Gaara.

* * *

After buying two small sandwiches from the streets, I start home with a heavy heart. The day's passed so fast, so rapidly - like sand slipping through my fingers. 

I'm down to two hundred yen - practically nothing, really. If I decide to continue living here, I'm at a disadvantage - I should possibly apply for a job? Flower arranging doesn't sound bad...

The lights - no, no lights. It's completely dark save for the meager light of the moon that reflects off the house. The moon appears to just hang beyond the rooftop.

It's a dead house. Even as I walk up the driveway, I know there won't be anyone here.

_No one to greet me..._

The window's open slightly like someone's waiting by it. Shadows dance across the shutters, making intricate, depthless designs.

_Death..._

I force myself to stop shivering and open the door.

The lights flicker on. I haven't touched anything...

"Hinata!" cries a voice that I haven't heard in three years.

_It's...but how?_

* * *

So that's that!! My Chapter Fourteen. Please review! I love to meet new people whether weird, hyper, or random :D 

Hinata isn't THAT OOC in this chapter I find, because she stammered a few times. Plus she's silent... HinaKiba or HinaSasu?

Lumberrrrrrry


	16. Visiting Sasuke

I'm just writing a random poem to fill up a eetle beetle space up here Of course it's not as nearly as wide as Sakur'as forehead (I just thought of thought. Funny. I don't know why I'm being such a Lumberry today.)

Title**: It's Fatal**

Narrated by: Narrator (me of course!!!)

Little Naruto Uzumaki

Sat in a corner,

Watching the girls all go by.

Along came Sakura,

And he said, "Hi, Sakura!"

And that's how he got a black eye.

_Neji_: It's stupid and pointless.

Me: W-wah-wah...!!

_Neji_: Hn.

* * *

"Hinata!" A girl in a simple white night-gown is perched rather lightly on the stairs, frozen like a painting. I see the graceful small hands, the small tilt of her head, the bleak landscape of her face, with white, white, white eyes. 

A thud in my heart. It's suddenly heavy.

She's -

* * *

From the last farewell... 

_"Do you...have to go?"_

_"Yea. You know the answer, Nee-chan. It's what Father says, so..." she trails off deliberately, then studies my face. "It'll be fine."_

_My throat is dry and I feel the tears slipping through my eyes. It suddenly seems as if she were the older sister and I the smaller one. I..._hate_...it._

_"I'll miss you."_

_"Same here. This rich boarding school's probably not all it's cracked up to be, right? It'll suck. So much for pleasing Dad."_

_Even though her mouth is then closed tightly, she does not cry. Her shoulders do not shudder, her eyes do not blink. She does not betray her emotions._

_And she does not shed a tear. Unlike me. She's stronger, surer. That's why it is she who is signed up for the good, wealthy life._

_And it's me who's left to rot._

_"G-good luck then...you'll need it." _

_Funny how much this differs from my opinion - _

_Just go, dammit! Get out of my sight. You're better. I don't care I don't care I wish you didn't exist I wish you were dead._

_"You too, Hinata. You too."_

I remember a faint smell of flowers as I hugged my sibling for the last time.

_But it's not the last time..._

* * *

She's back. 

Hanabi Hyuuga, real live and close, flesh and blood. My little sister.

Her hair has changed - it's longer but shorter than Neji's, combed and slightly wavy. She looks much taller and less rail-like. Large orb-like eyes rest on a thin face. She was nearly six when she went to boarding school. Math; three years have passed - she's nine now.

Nine...almost ten...

And yet so adult-like, like a miniature of Hiashi. Proud nose, sharp chin. Eyes that are so much older than the actual age - eyes like Neji's.

"Hinata?" The rational part of my brain is saying "no-duh; it's obvious," but the emotional counterpart of me won't accept it; _Who is she?...I've never seen her before._

"Hey, you weren't like this the last time I saw you," she says, leaping down sprightly. Her hand grazes my hair. "What happened to your hair, Onee-chan? And Hiashi's not here, either - that's odd. He always mopes around the house."

At the mention of my deceased father's name I know my face has turned white.

"Hinata? How come you're so..." She eyes the dark circles under my sharply contrasting pale eyes.

"You've changed. I'm Hanabi. Don't tell me you forgot. I know _I_ changed, but..." _She hasn't. Not one bit. She's still the sycophant I hated. Loathed._

Not the slightest noise escapes my lips. She sighs. "I'm Hanabi," she repeats, and looks upwards and points towards Father's room. "My luggage is in his room. Remember? I'm supposed to visit?"

I blink, the gesture foreign. "Th-that's fine." Cobwebs are stuck in my throat, my brain, my heart. "I - I'll talk to you tomorrow." At least the words are coherent. "S-sorry," I rasp. I feel her gaze as I rush past her, rush past my...past...

"Hinata!" she calls yet again, but this time I ignore it deliberately, locking the door.

* * *

It's five o'clock. I know, because I haven't slept for a single minute and I've been watching the clock. About six hours ago I heard the door of the room next to mine shut softly, and footsteps. 

I can't sleep. It sounds stupid, but I've just realized I've been taking my ability to sleep for granted. Always, it's me who's the log. Me that Father always scolded. Me who slept solely for the purpose of escaping.

Escaping...

It's futile and I know it in my bones. Quickly I throw off the covers - it's freezing, and even though I expect it, the cold knocks my breath away - and slip on my clothes. They're just as icy, and I shiver.

Out the window. I've never done it - I didn't need to - but on this first time, it feels so natural. Escape. I slide down the roof noiselessly and jump off onto the grass, trying to be as invisible as possible.

All my life I've done it, been it without meaning to. It's not hard at all.

Where to go? It feels so free. Konoha looks inviting even in the night. There are no people in the streets - all is silent. But the lights remain on, as if they're substituting for people.

A thought crosses my mind lightly, but it echoes a thousand times like raindrops. _Sas...uke..._

The first reasonable thought to stay in my mind. I'll visit him. After all, it's my fault he got hurt, I've been worrying, I have absolutely nothing else better to do, and otherwise I'm entitled to a house with Hanabi.

_Konoha Hospital_, radiates a glow-in-the-dark sign. I see nurses and late-shift-doctors walking around, busy, like they were perfect for the job and knew their goals in life. I enter warily, trying to look inconspicuous yet present enough so the receptionist can notice me.

She does. "You are here for..."

"To see Sasuke?" It comes out as a question and I strengthen my voice. "Sasuke Uchiha."

She nods and rifles in a towering stack of orange papers next to her. "Uchiha..." She takes out the paper. I wonder how on earth she's going to ever manage to place it back. "Room 105."

"Thanks."

What I didn't thank her for was directions. Pretty soon I find myself in hallways where there are old people, badly damaged. I take a blind left, trying to erase the lost looks one of the old men had.

And there it is, in bold, overestimated print. Room 105. Haven of comfort after my home of hell.

I don't bother to knock. He's probably going to be asleep, anyway.

The light from the hallway gradually seeps in. He speaks right away. "Who is it? I know you're there."

I start, my grip still on the doorknob. The seam of light that spills on the floor shudders. I focus on it, trying to make my voice sound sure and clear. "I'm Hinata. I..." Frantially I search in my mile-long list of excuses but come up empty-fisted. Crap. What now?

"Hinata?" There's a trace of surprise, but the inside is guarded. It's like peering into a glass aquarium and finding that the fish are really floating in an opaque box that I can't see into. "Come in, then..."

Walk, step, inch, nanometer. "Um..._Gomenasai_ for bothering you. I was just..."

"That's okay." His silhouette reaches up and flicks on the light.

The world morphs and changes. Sasuke is in his bed, propped up by thick pillows. I notice that there are eleven get-better-soon cards and at least thirty chocolates on his bedstand.

"So...?"

"I was just...worried..." I look at anything but his eyes, afraid of what they were carrying. Disgust? Curiosity? What-a-weird-girl? "...that you were hurt or something. I - I don't know. It's stupid. I should have, well..."

He leans back on the headboard, his face clearly exhausted. "That's fine."

A few loud ticks of the clock pass before I decide to sit down on the chair that was farthest away from his bed. "It's just..." It's just nothing, you idiot, I curse myself. It's just stupid. You're portraying yourself as a total idiot here!

_There is a mark on his neck._

It's dark and -

He shifts to look at me. "So?" he asks, as if expecting for _me_ to say something. "What?"

All thoughts of the mark fade away into nothingless as I stare into his pool of black eyes. "I don't know. I couldn't sleep," I confess. His eyes are omniscient.

He sighs and looks down. "What is it? Flowers? Cards? Chocolate? Hurry up and get it done with."

"Wh-_what_?!"

His mouth quirks up. "Don't think that you're the first one. The other girls arrived around three. I'm going to die of insomnia, I just know it.

Anyway..." His half-smile disappears. "Get it over with. It's annoying."

I understand, rather swiftly for someone like me. "I'm not here for that! I - I was bored and I was worried..."

He's back to looking serious. "That's what they all say," he returns, his frown deepening.

"I'm really not!" Now it's sincere, and the words are pouring out. "I'm not a fangirl and I don't plan on being one! I really wasn't sleepy and I was anxious because of the Chuunin exams - I think it's at least partially my fault; the least I can do it visit you and hope you'll be better..."

The door creaks slightly, interrupting my protest.

"Hinata? Hinata Hyuuga? Your cousin Neji is looking for you." It's a slight, frazzled-looking nurse. "He says you need to be quick."

"I - okay." A fleeting glance back - Sasuke was back to looking bored - and I hurry out the door.

My heartbeat has increased ten fold and I'm wondering why the heck anyone would be searching for me at five thirty in the morning. But then again, that's probably what Sasuke wonders too.

* * *

That was my favorite chappie so far! I'm also working on Baby Steps and please review on this and that.

And...Happy Early-Snowdays! Can't WAIT for snow XD

I'm suddenly obsessed with Sasuke. I don't know why. But I still love Neji...it's hard, isn't it?

Always and I will remain,

Lumberrrrrrrrrrrrry (the annoying r's!!)


	17. Hate Comes Back

I just felt like typing. Don't take my craziness personally :D

_Imagination consideration condensation _

_infatuation precipitation it's an imigration it's a regurgitation _

_you're on probation...stipulation manipulation excellentation _

_pretentiation ostentiation orthography-ation...nothingation..._

_crazy-ation indulgence-ation ation-ation..._

Dang...I have ANOTHER concert today!! It's playing violin at the mall. The last concert was on Friday XP

This is my favorite chappie yet but of course every chappie is a favvie!!

Enjoy!

* * *

**November 7,** Year of the Cresecent Moon 

_- 5:39 - _

He's waiting by the door with an impatient expression outlined on his features. His arms are folded and his stance is secretive, not wanting to do with anything in the outside world.

I feel strangely disappointed, but he's -

_Like he always is. Why should I expect differently, especially from someone like him?_

When I arrive Neji immediately starts talking. "Hinata. Tsunade says that Hanabi has arrived. A reminder, in case you should forget." He doesn't pause, doesn't consider anything. "Tomorrow is the seventh Test. You won't be taking it."

My eyes widen slightly at this but he continues in that same indifferent tone, "Test Seven was merely a battle against your partner. Obviously it's not likely that Sasuke - " I hear a slight catch in his voice - "going to be ready."

A test? A battle, more like. I shudder inwardly, picturing my ripped up body after the effects of Chidori.

"That's all."

I reflect on thanking him, my heart in battle with my mind. The mind wins. "Thank you for telling me, Neji."

He doesn't respond at first. I peer into his face, his eyes haunted by the crude light of the hospital. His mouth opens. "What were you thinking?"

"Wh-what?"

"_What were you thinking?!_ You didn't tell me about Hiashi's death. You didn't tell me about Hanabi's arrival. It seems," he utters, his voice now cold, "that you want nothing to do with me. Your cousin."

"I...I didn't mean that. I was just - in some kind of a, a flunk after his death. I didn't want to talk - " His eyes don't buy it and I rush on, "It was horrible! And even I didn't remember about her visit. I - "

"You were being stupid, then," he cuts in.

I barely realize there's a small smirk placed on his mouth. _He wanted me to feel bad. _

"And to think I'm supposed to protect some simpleton like you."

_No...stop it. I'm trying to figure my feelings after death, and you're saying I should...do what?! What MORE CAN I DO?_

I don't answer but I feel the cold rivulets running down my cheeks.

If he sees my tears he obviously doesn't care and doesn't understand,

"Hinata, I'm supposed to _protect_ you. And in the sixth Test you were all but killing yourself. Now that Hiashi's dead, I'm free to go. I don't need to be applied with this burden. Some person like you shouldn't take it lightly that I'm excusing myself. No, Hinata..." His voice diminishes but his rage does not;

"I'm not free. I'm still not free of my destiny." His voice is bleak, speaking the truth. "I'm still in the Branch, and whether I have to risk my life to save the Main part of the clan...it's still my job, even if I go against it. I'm still considered to be..." The last word is echoed harshly. "...Branch."

Sunlight suddenly seeps into the air, and I see his face. It's frightening. It's the face of someone who seems to have gone mad.

"I can't change my destiny. Neither can you. And you're tied up with every other idiot. Like Naruto. Like Kiba..."

At the mention of Kiba's voice I jump, my tears stopping. "D-don't say that! Kiba and N-naruto aren't like that. They're kind people - "

"They're fools are what they are."

Now I feel the bottle anger rushing to escape, fizz out. I absorb strength, even courage, from this unstoppable rage.

"Who do _you_ think you are to say that? I...I can change my destiny. A-anyone can! I'm already making new friends a-and - and - "

The word drops like a stone. "Friends." Bitterly he stares at me. "There aren't any such things as friends. Tools, maybe - " He touches his kunai pouch, "but nothing more."

Angry winds whistle through the trees, snapping off a few dead branches.

"I hate you," he utters, completely serious.

I freeze.

"I _hate_ you," he repeats. Animosity fills his pale lavender eyes. He opens the pouch and draws a shiny kunai out, his gaze still focused on mine. "You're the only obstacle that is in my path. Do you realize - " His voice grows louder, more infuriated, "that I could kill you right now? I could kill you, and - "

"That won't be necessary."

I turn around hastily, astonished.

Sasuke stands there, looking extremely ticked off. "What's with you? You're always acting so high and mighty." He walks up to Neji. Both their eyes narrow angrily. "I'm sick of how you talk to Hinata that way."

The kunai Neji holds rises - so does Sasuke's fist -

_It's happening too soon. Two lives, circled twice - four deaths..._

_His uncle, my father...my uncle, his father...and now them. I have to do something._

_**I can't let this go on!**_

And a shrill voice escapes - "N - no! Stop it!" I'm seeing images, images of the dead, rotting, brown corpses. "S-stop it!" My hands are on my ears and I'm shaking my head to stop the death, the stench of blood -

"STOP IT!!"

It's louder than I intended to state, and the receptionist hurries out, carrying two pieces of paper and her clipboard.

At the sight of the two Genin her mouth grows open in shock.

Quickly Neji looks at the situation, his mouth twisted unnaturally into a false smile. But the words that come out are soft. "I'm sorry. Gomenasai. It's my fault." He stares at me, hate coloring the world, and then straightens up, the kunai disappears in his shirt sleeve.

My cousin turns away and walk off.

The flustered nurse stares at Sasuke, now her only victim. "And you! Y-you're supposed to stay in bed!"

Sasuke looks guarded and doesn't meet my eyes. "Sorry." A smooth voice, designed for disguise.

He enters the hospital without another word, another look. Most of my brain won't acknowledge what has happened.

_He...he has...stood up...for me..._

I notice the mark on his neck as he walks away, supported by the nurse. It's made of three swirls.

Somehow this design scares me more than anything I've ever seen before.

_Sasuke...what happened while you were underwater?_

* * *

_(Shall I write more? Evil voice. Okay. I shall write more.)_

* * *

It's nearly eight o'clock by the time I walk home. Those few hours were spent under a tree on the training grounds, thinking about what has happened.

The training grounds comfort me. Not because that it has my blood, my sweat, and my tears on the poles that I have trained relentlessly upon, but it's also where Kiba and I fought. Those memories are lodged into my brain forever.

The...only happy memories from a long time...ago...

At least, it feels so long ago. So untouchable. I'd started on the path of grieving and learning how to accept myself.

Now Neji has torn me from that path and I am walking on air, walking and now...

F

a

ll

i

n

g

I don't know how to get up. Yes, I'm out of my shell but now I lie broken, in bits, on the swirling, snowy ground, my soul and my confidence shattered.

* * *

I need more ideas desperately!! (not to mentiion more reviews :P)

Sasuke is cute in this chappie, no? I'm suddenly obsessed with him XD

And you, reader, are about to ask me stuffs...

**You: So...Lumberry...Why did you make Neji so mean?**

**Me: (Indifferently): Mean? He's not mean. He's hot.**

**You: ...(sweatdrops). But you wrote about his eyes and the hate and...**

**Me: That's how he honestly feels before he realizes that destinies CAN, in fact, be changed. (nods) (sips coffee) (nods again)**

**You: ...(sweatdrops). Coffee? You're only thirteen. It's not good to get a caffeine addiction.**

**Me; (by this time I have already drunk all of it) (throws down cup) (runs into sunset screaming "Neji!!")**

**You: ...(sweatdrops): I'm suddenly dehydrated.**

Get it?? Sweatdrops ARE made of water, right? So if you use a lotta sweatdrops you get dehydrated or something XD

I feel hyper and random today. I could use a few cookies!

Lumberrrrrry


	18. SubChapter Snowmen

Yay! Chappie Eighteen of Hinata!!

PS This filler-chapter is **VERY** random XD

Just thought of warning. It's rather disturbing, actually.

_**Disclaimer**_:

Neji: Lumberry doesn't own Naruto.

Me: Yup! Keep going.

Neji: Lumberry also does not own Hinata.

Me: Noooooooo, not _Naruto!_ Of COURSE I don't own him!"

Neji: ... Lumberry also does not own Kiba or Sasuke.

Me: Nooooooooooooooooo keep going.

Neji: (sighs) Lumberry does not own Kakashi.

Me: Stupid.

Neji: Lumberry does not own the weird squirrel that Rock Lee has on his shoulder in the second part of the Chuunin exams in the woods of the Forbbiden Forest in epis -

Me: I don't know how I think such a dolt is cute, but... (Neji sniffles)

Here's the Chapter Eighteen!!

* * *

It's still 

**November 7,** Year of the Crescent Moon

_- 12:36 - _

I mope around all morning under the training grounds. It hurts; my back, my neck, my head that's spinning; everything that has happened since I moved into eighth grade - it's jumbled up into this seemingly gigantic lollipop-swirl that keeps spinning...

It's also snowing, the first snow of the season...Konoha's winters come in fast and the snow swirls, dampening my hair and I lay there silently...

_Stop it._

The Genin should be done fighting by now; it's obvious I'm not going to fight Sasuke. I wonder if I'm now graded on a sixty-scale instead of a seventy-scale? And if I passed as a Chuunin?

Hah. Scratch that. Expunge that. Obliterate it; no where in my life will I _ever_ be as good to be a Chuunin. Genin is all I have.

I rest my head against the warm, scarred bark of the ancient oak tree...

"Hinata!" I jump. It's Naruto. Normally I'd be annoyed by his loud and obnoxious voice, but today I'm glad to have a change of pace.

My smile is genuine, the first in many days. I turn around - sure enough, the blond ninja is grinning cheekily at me.

"Hi, Hinata!"

"Hi. Did you win?"

"You bet!" His fist pumps the air. "I beat Chouki easy!" His eyes dance mischievously. Yes_...Chouki._

My smile somehow loses its focus. I think of my chances of becoming a Chuunin. "That's goo - "

"Hey guys!!" shrieks Ino, running up. There's Temari, Shikamaru, TenTen, Yumeki, _Chouji_, and even Shino, following behind. "How was your day? Boring? Is Sasu - "

Her voice is interrupted by Shikamaru's annoyed one, but my heart is already filled with happiness for merely existence.

_They were...all looking for me. Me! Hinata._

"Let her get used to you, dang it, Ino!" he complains. "It's troublesome."

She ignores him, and continues - "I WON!!" she shrieks, and then turns back to her partner, Yumeki. "Sorry."

The black-haired, blue-eyed kunoichi shrugs it off with an unusually soft voice. "That's okay. I understand."

I feel like smiling again, expecting a rainbow to appear in the -

_snow -_

It's really snowing now - I just realized everything is white! The Genin are all wearing jackets and tightly wrapped scarves; I'm in a thin shirt and long capris.

But I'm strong. I mean...snow's not such a big deal for Konoha.

"It's...snowing!" The whiteness contrasts sharply with Yumeki's ebony dark hair.

"Yes..." Shino talks again, his voice rather warm. "The first snow of the season."

"Snow, huh?" says Shikamaru.

Temari grins, flashing a look at him. "I'm up for making a snowman!"

"Let's go, then!" exclaims Chouji excitedly, the first time eager for something that was non-edible (A/N: Snow...is technically un-edible, right?? Or...?).

_- 12:52 - _

We laughed, grinned, talked, argued, and threw snowballs for ten minutes until I heard the sound of bickering.

Two figures are walking in the near distance, both faces sullen.

Sakura's voice; "It's not _my_ fault he was hurt! It's a freaking battle!"

Kiba ignores her and walks faster to us, his cheeks flushed and his mouth set in an angry line.

My surprise at the difference lasts for a second; then I realize what it is... "Where's Akamaru?"

Kiba surprisingly shoots Sakura a furious glare, and she returns one with equal venom. "She _injured_ him. He's in the hospital. Intensive care!"

Sakura throws up her hands. "How was _I_ supposed to know who was the real Kiba? It's because of your stupid jutsu that morphs the two of you into condescending jac - "

"Shut up, you - "

"Weeeell," I try to cut in lightly, but I see the emotion raging in his eyes, "It's snowing and we're...having fun?"

And we _were_; everyone (including Shino) was singing "Deck the Halls" with great off-keyness until two seconds ago.

"Snowmen?" He wrinkles his nose and points. "There're two in the distance."

It's true; and one snowman is taller and larger than the skinnier one. Both are wearing green scarves. Ino, Temari and TenTen are unwrapping the green scarves and laughing.

"Did you guys make it?" inquires Kiba, looking back at me, his attention diverted. I'm glad I got him off the subject, if just a little.

"Um, no, we - " I start to say just as -

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIT'S THE SNOWMAN!" shrieks Ino. "MY GOD HE'S AFTER US!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Chasing her is the clear image of the skinny snowman, intent on getting its scarf back.

"What the f - " But that's cut off as Kiba starts running.

The _fat_ snowman is chasing..._us._

* * *

The rest of us Genin don't act, don't use any techniques - no, no that's for the smart ninja, us Genin - we scream bloody murder. I swear. Even Shino (his scream is rather high-pitched). 

The six of us - screaming Shino, hysterical Chouji, Sakura, Kiba, Yumeki, and me - run as fast as our little legs can run. I'm aware of the excitement pounding through my body, I'm actually laughing though there's this murderous snowman chasing us - actually laughing, until -

Chouji trips. "AIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!" he yells as the snowman gains on him. We watch, open-mouthed.

The snowman runs to him -

and trips over Chouji.

His head falls off.

Bowl cut, huge eyebrows, spandex suit - wait...that's -

Gai-sensei the Snowman.

* * *

- _1:20 - _

"Sorry, kids," Gai-sensei laughs awkwardly. We're crowded around a small fire that he managed to eke out of the snow. "Lee and I..."

"We were training!" Rock Lee grins, his eyes shining. "It was great! Except I couldn't see, so I thought Ino was a bloodthirsty murderous missing nin-murderer who was trying to kill me with muderous intent on his murderingness!"

"Yeah," mutters Shikamaru, his hair in a huge snowball (he must've fell several times), "that's what we thought you were."

"_Me?_" Rock Lee is geuinely shocked. "Why would I - ?"

"That's off-topic," chimes in TenTen, shivering. "Who in their _sane mind_ would train in such a...weird...place?"

"In a snowman," clarifies Shino in his usual low voice. We stare at him, wondering how in the world could he have laughed so high.

"Well," grins Gai-sensei, sharing a look at Lee, "we are ninja and it is almost Springtime!"

Rock Lee scrunches his brows. "Yes, Gai-sensei! The fire of Springtime can shine down on us if we always train!"

Kiba growls, "You are idiots!"

They tear up. "We..."

The rest of us have deadly gleams in our eyes.

* * *

- _1:50 - _

"Well..." yawns Naruto, "_that_ was some good training."

Both of the green ninja have two black eyes and fat lips.

* * *

Sorry for all you serious readers out there!! Gomenasai! (cracks up) 

But I had to get some steam off!! School is really going to my head. Thank you all for reviewing!

And it snowed! It actually snowed!

But nooooooooooo, no snow day. Anywhere ELSE an inch of snow probably is, but nooooooooooooooooooo. Not HERE.

Oh, and please **review**!! I'm not very good at humor, so get me on the right track or I'll be up by midnight singing carols and eating eggnog -

XD Lumberrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry


	19. Friendship, Love, or Neither?

Hi!! I'm back, the great Lumberry-Berry is baaack!! XD

So this is my nineteenth chapter of The Life and Story of Hinata. I'm also on Sasuke's and Sakura's Baby Steps, but I don't know how I'm doing...so review!

_Also, there are quite a few arguments in **this** chapter and the **next** ones, so I'll use my cute little "Gasp" smiley;_

O.O for the real profanity (cut me some slack; I haven't hit 9th grade yet). I know, yes, whatever, but in order to make it as realistic as possible... (rants for three more hours)...I'll have to use a few O.Os here and there!

Also, I listed it as "real profanity." I don't cut out the words that really should be in there, even for eighth-grade-level talking.

Disclaimer: Naruto the anime/manga doesn't belong to moi, but Neji the hot guy/cute guy also does not! Boohoohoo! (cries for two hours) Isn't that sad, guys? Guys?!

Whatever XO. I've been working my butt off, since the "temporary" glitch has deleted part of it, so you'd better review!! XD

**

* * *

November 8,** Year of the Crescent Moon

_- 2:08 after training with Kiba and Shino - _

Kiba and I are going to part ways soon, just at the little intersection of the streets. Before I can exchange goodbyes, though, he says quickly, "Um, can you meet with me at nine o'clock-at-the-main-gate?"

"I...why?"

His gaze slips away.

"To say bye... I'm going to escort Yumeki back to her Waterfall village, and I won't be here for at least four days..."

I still think it's rather abrupt, but...

"Um, sure."

He looks relieved. "Thanks."

"No problem. I-I'll be there."

-_ 8:45 - _

Ino, Sakura, and I visit Sasuke late in the evening.

The flowers, cards, candy, chocolate, teddy bears, and Sasuke-dolls had quickly accumulated over the course of little more than one day.

Sasuke is sitting upright, looking both bored and alert, with countless gifts tossed on his bed.

Ino blanches; Sakura's eyebrows rise, as they finger their own gifts; a daffodil and a plate of cookies, respectively. I didn't bring anything, but Ino opted for me to at least hold a card, which I do.

"What's up, Saskuke?" Sakura asks shyly. I stay by the door, ready to yawn if things get incredibly slow-paced and pointless.

"Nothing." Sasuke looks ready to scowl. He's wearing a black cotton sweater which covers his neck. Covers his mark. I'm only wearing a thin jacket, but it's warm in the hopital. "Aren't visits...only supposed to be two minutes?"

"No," smiles Ino, with snow flakes still studded in her hair. They are melting, and her hair is rapidly poofing, "we asked, and the nurse says we can stay as long as we want! Isn't that awesome?"

His eye twitches, and he falls silent again, looking to the window for something to pique his interest. But it was just snow, plain, white snow, and he sighs, looking down at his blanket instead.

A few awkward moments pass (I _am_ yawning by now) and Sakura asks tentatively, "How are you feeling, Sasuke?"

He doesn't respond, but he glances over to me, eyebrows raised in obvious annoyance. _How come they were all dragged along?_

I grin back apologetically - _It's none of my business; it's yours to take care of - , _and he scowls.

"Let's go," Ino says, her voice toneless. I can't tell if she's bored or disppointed with this visit. Sakura reluctantly agrees, and they leave their gifts on his nightstand, next to two colossal life-size (teddy) bears and a ginormous card that reads in blue, curly font, "_I LOVE YOU SOSKE! BE MINE_!"

When we're outside and I'm shivering in the jacket, wishing I'd brought a windbreaker, Sakura turns to us, saying, "I...have to go eat dinner. Thanks for...you know, coming with me."

She didn't even eat yet? She postponed her dinner just for some worthless little visit to her crush?

I would say it was deep, had not the visit been totally and pointlessly a time-waster.

When Sakura is out of earshot Ino promptly turns towards me with anger blazing in her ice-blue eyes. I cringe and take a step back. _What_ -

"_Thanks_, Hinata!" she cries sarcastically, "Crap! Thanks for that _obvious flirting!"_

"What? Wait; I didn't do anything!"

"You like him, don't you?!" she hisses, "I saw that grin!"

This is the side of Ino that's terryfying, without any reason. I saw that side once, when I was the new girl.

Weren't we _friends? Friends_ aren't like this! One little misstep and they leave you choking in the dust!

_She's not _my_ friend, then!_

"Ino! It's not - "

"Sasuke is _mine_, okay? It's bad enough I've got to compete with that freaking forehead idiot - " she jerks her head towards Sakura's direction, then face me again with her hostile glare, "but _you're _competition! You - "

"Let me get you straight! It's not - "

" - stay away from him, got it?! And I thought we were friends!" She stomps away, her footprints leaving deep marks in the snow.

_Wow...touchy._

* * *

_- 8:57 at home - _

As soon as I get home I call her, after angrily kicking away my snow-caked boots and my jacket.

"Ino - " I start as soon as she picks the phone up, but she cuts me off.

"Tell him you don't like him!"

"What?!" So she's finally gotten to this high level of a conclusion.

Okay. So I know that's mean, but my callousness is a tiny speck of rice compared to her whole field.

"Tell. Him. You. DON'T. LIKE. HIM. **_NOW!"_**

She slams down the phone, the noise echoeing in my brain.

Note to self; Avoid loud noises.

I sigh, inwardly unlike my calm outward appearance. I dial her number again. "Ino! Listen to me; how the O.O am I supposed to - "

"Shut up! Just do it! Don't ever call me again."

_Slaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam._ _Screeeeeeeeeeeeeech._

Second note to self: ...

I sigh again, but inside my emotions are boiling. _How dare she!! How could she do this to me?!_

I slip on my coat (the warmer one this time) and start out the driveway.

_"Um, can you meet with me at nine o'clock-at-the-main-gate?"_

_"No problem. I-I'll be there."_

Kiba!

I had completely forgotten.

What to do? There is no way in hell I can do both at the same time.

_If I..._

If I skipped Kiba's invitation, I know I'll regret it (he's officially my best friend now, since my former "best friend" is obivously not currently on speaking terms with me), and I also promised him I'd be there. And I _know_ I'll miss his presence when he escorts Yumeki...

On the other hand, Ino's "friendship" is on a delicate, yet utterly twisted, standstill.

If I_ don't_ tell Sasuke, Ino will surely remain hostile. She's being such a O.O on such a wasteful subject.

_But..._

_I do understand_.

I understand how it felt before, three months ago, when it felt alone. I was mad, much angrier than Ino is even now; mad at the whole world for not noticing my existence. I was Invisible. A Nothing.

But even Ino...acknowledges who I am really even if she's furious at me right now. Enraged at me.

_I _do_ understand._

But it doesn't help, does it now?

_It doesn't help at all thinking over it; _do_ something!_

I'm still paused at the end of my driveway, a bundle of snowflakes resting coolly against my hair.

My best bet was to say farewell to Kiba, then Sasuke... or it wasn't such a "good" bet after all...

It gets late easily in Konoha's autumn-winter; darkness settles in as soon as six o'clock.

So..._if I go to Sasuke's first, but what if I go back to Kiba and he's not there? There's at least half a possibility he would get tired of waiting._

Just then Sakura walks across the street, carrying two packages of leftover restaurant food; she'd just finished dinner.

An idea squirms itself into my brain; the lightbulb dimly flicks on.

"Sakura!" I yell, running across the street.

She looks confused when I launch into explaining the story, but she gets it fast enough.

Can't say I know where the brain cells were hid when Sakura was visiting Sasuke, but...

"That's easy enough," she says hesitantly, "so I could transform into you?"

"Yeah - that's exactly what I'd been thinking, too."

"I'll meet Kiba, I suppose," her blush is still visible in the dark, "because I know I'll stutter if I go to S-sasuke."

I draw a breath. "That's fine. I mean, Kiba won't know the difference without Akamaru...but hurry up, okay?"

We agree to meet back in fifteen minutes - 9:30 - , and Sakura deposits her food into a nearby trashcan, her eyes brimming with excitement.

"Let's go!"

* * *

**Sakura**

_- 9:07 - _

Kiba is waiting by the main gate when I arrive.

"You're late, Hinata. Yumeki's already started off."

"Um..." My voice comes out quieter than I had intended...or was Hinata's voice always this high? I can't remember... "Sorry, Kiba."

"That's fine..."

I never noticed before...how _tall_ he looks without his huge gray (A/N: not to mention unflattering) jacket. The contours of his body are easy to distinguish even by the tiny, crude, light on the gate.

There's this look in his eyes like he's expecting for me - for Hinata - to do something.

I wonder how well he knows Hinata...

...a hug would suffice, right?

* * *

**Hinata**

-_ 9:08 - _

I arrive in the hospital slightly out of breath, but I manage to find my way around without getting lost or seeing old, wizened people.

When I open the door - luckily he's alone, no annoying fangirls - I see that there are literally mountains of presents stacked on his bed, one stack touching the ceiling, another almost falling off.

My mouth curves into a grin automatically - poor Sasuke!

This is the first time that he's not propped up in bed being aloof - he's sleeping, his head tilted slightly to the right. His eyelids snap open, though, as the door screeches.

Dang door.

"Sasuke?" I manage, and he sits up, blinking and looking slightly annoyed, "um..." I know somehow I'm supposed to say it, spit it out, but I have no idea how.

"Well..." Better be brutally honest than anything else, right? "Ino's being suspicious of...well, our, um, re-relationship, so I'm just..." I rush out, "I'm-just-classifying-that-we're-just-friends-right?"

The words come out, tumbling to the floor, but he understands fast enough. He blinks again, and deliberately takes his time.

"You tell me."

"I - " I forge ahead but have no idea what I'm saying "It could be a possibility, yeah - one percent? I mean, it's not likely that-we're-more-than-friends-I'm-just-saying-this-to-get-Ino-off-my-back - SorryifI'mbotheringyou." I let out a nervous laugh.

His face has already turned guarded, his eyes inscrutinable. "That's fine. I don't care." He lays back, slips the covers over his chest. "So now, if you don't mind, I'll go back to sleep."

Silence.

It's already over. I turn around blindly.

_Thank the gods above_..._it's over...I've done it. I hope Ino's going to forgive me now..._

But between the roads, I realize what I've done and my heart plummets downward.

It should have been incisive, a clean cut down the middle of friendship and something more. A clean cut with no damage done.

But why did I feel breathless? Why did I feel like my heart stopped beating, just then?

_Why has it ended like...this?_

* * *

So that's it. 

I'm not happy with my reviews!

You know, it's easy. Just click that button. You know you want to...that little, precious button? With your index finger. Or whatever, if you'r missing your index finger. Just click it!...Or I may be forced to chop off your limbs (does a Yamato ghost-eyes face)...

(Cheerful again) But then again, just review and you shall be glad to still have the limbs that I have benevolently left you.

...It was SNOWING TODAY!! Like, one inch!! It MUST BE a two hour delay tomorrow! If it is I shall update!! XD

Lumberry: Bye for now, Neji!

Neji: Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Lumberry: Heeeeeeeeeeeeeey, that's MY line!

Neji: Good riddance to Lumberry.

Lumberry: (cluelessly) Now I feel both depressed and special...why?

Lumberry and Neji: REVIEW!!

(throws random confetti that magically appeared in reach)

Lumberrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry


	20. Slut: The Kiss Stealer

**Chapter Twenty!!**

**As I approach this milestone, the only thought I have is, "Wow...I've written a lot."**

Well, please review!!!!

**Neji**: Keep on wishing.

**Me**: Pessimistic much?!

**Neji**: Whatever.

**Me**: (sucks thumb)

**Neji**: ...

**Me**: Wead and rewiew!! (I actually put my thumb in my mouth and said it to see what it sounded like! XD)

**Neji**:...You're not much of a optimist, either... (inches away)**

* * *

**

**Sakura**

_- 9:08 - _

I hug him, feeling extremely awkward. His body tenses, and then relazes, his face black in the shadows. We stay there for a few more seconds...

And then it comes so fast I don't move - I know it's an accident, my foot slips - where does Hinata buy her shoes?! - and he turns his face two inches swiftly, obviously concerned, but -

**Hinata**

I rush out, the most idiotic person alive. Blindly I walk, trying to sort out my emotions, to no degree of coherence. Where's Sakura? I need to meet her, need to hurry up and get this ordeal over with. _How did you think you could pull it off?_ Then,_ it doesn't matter. At least it's over - another part of my stupid, embarrassing life is over. Who cares about friendships? Who cares about - about more than friendships? It's not worth it!_

The only light reflects off of the main gate. _She's there...maybe she's done by now. Well, I'm going to tell her I'm done. She should be finished saying bye..._

**Sakura**

...Our lips touch.

**Hinata**

They're kissing. I swear, what the O.O!

_What the hell is she doing?! _My stomach churns, and I grab a nearby treetrunk for support. The world tilts, up, down. I throw up, more out of shock than disgust. When it's over I taste the horrible bitterness in my mouth, and I lean heavily against the tree, wiping my mouth violently.

_Sakura, you slut!_

She's in MY FORM right now! I cough, my jaw clenching so hard I can just feel my teeth break. My eyes sting.

_NO!!_

I won't stay silent! I won't! I WILL tell her that she's a sick, twisted person with a sick, twisted mind! _HOW COULD SHE - _

"Hinata...bye." It's his soft voice. Kiba's.

_I can't look at you, Kiba! It's not me, god! I wouldn't do that, Kiba...you have...the - the wrong impression. _

_I thought I liked you. And I do! I do, too much. _

But that doesn't help things...it's too fast, the world is whirring by, my hair swaying helplessly against the brutal wind.

I see myself - Hinata Hyuuga - as Kiba rushes off. The fake Hinata. He left her, Sakura, with a smile, that soft, faint smile.

He left _me_ feeling as if my heart has been ripped into smithereens.

**Sakura**

Just like that, it's over...I can't believe...but yes...I wish that moment could last forever...

**Hinata**

As soon as Sakura un-transforms and starts to leave, I jump to my chance.

"What the HELL were you THINKING, you whore?!!!"

She's confused, but then her face turns red, even under her makeup. "You saw! That's so perverted!"

I get right into her face. "You're the slut! How _could you?!"_

"Hey, whoa!" She holds up her hands and gives me a pointed glare. "He kissed me first!"

"You kissed him back!!"

Once again her befuddlement turns into rage. "So _what_!" she yells, making me madder than ever, "Do you REALIZE how LUCKY you are?" Her hands clench. "How lucky that I didn't push him away? How are you _upset_ about that, anyway?!"

"GOD, SAKURA!" I scream back, glad that she's stunned by my anger. Good - it's _time_ she got to meet the real me! - "You just don't _understand_, do you? Since you're SAKURA and not HINATA, and now he's gonna get the wrong impre - "

Her eyes bulge. I can't believe I ever thought that the shade of green was pretty, "If you're upset, that means you DON'T LIKE HIM! Well - " Her shoulders heave angrily, "I'LL have him for a boyfriend then! You're a two-faced, conceited O.O who doesn't think of how _I_ feel!

You don't _deserve him! _You're just a - "

I scream back, not fearing consequences, lead by a flash of madness, "And _you don't_ deserve SASUKE!"

Silence falls suddenly, though her mouth is still open, her eyes still furious. I'm aware that I only feel rage, anger, nothing else, no tears, no disappointment. Only enhilaration. Enraged.

"O-okay then," she hisses, her voice trembling with venom. Somehow it's much creepier than when she shrieked her pretty little head off, "Mind you, I don't care if I have Kiba. I have the tendency to be grateful, you know! _And_ I don't care anymore, not anymore, if you have Sasuke."

"Fine! I - I don't care either!" I can't show my weakness, that every ounce of my brain is screaming _"Stop! You'll regret this!" _My conscience shatters, drowns, and I plunge forward hastily, "I don't _like_ Kiba _that_ way!"

She smirks suddenly, apparently satisfied. A coldness envelopes my heart. _What am I getting myself in to now?_

"I'll be sure to tell him when he gets back. I'll be sure to tell him_ everything_ that happened." She smiles again, smugly.

_I hate her._

_I **hate** her._

"Promise?"

I can't show that I am afraid. I can't. "Yes."

"Fine, then. and you can't go back on your word, _Hinata._"

"Fine!" I'll show her. My fists clench, then unclench. _I'll get revenge!_

She leaves.

* * *

It's ten o'clock now and I'm sitting under the tree that I always train on. A kunai rests near me; I plunge it into the ground, my hand and arm shaking. 

_It's ironic..._

A tear falls before I can wipe it away.

_It's rather ironic..._

Three hours ago I was best friends with Ino. And friends with Sakura. With two relationships...Sasuke...and Kiba...

_And now?_ inquires a voice in my head, sounding startingly close to Ino's.

I shut my eyes, but tears keep falling.

Now? _Now?_

It's gone. All gone.

* * *

**November 9**, Year of the Crescent Moon 

I am dreaming...

Someone holds me, safely, snugly. I'm happy, content. This feeling is shocking. I haven't felt happiness in...what seems like a millenium.

That someone's breath is sweet, and his head rests on my hair. There's a cool breeze...and then suddenly I felt cold, freezing.

"Kiba belongs to me!" It was a girl's voice, one that suspicously sounded like Sakura's.

Then Ino... "Sasuke belongs to ME! Don't take him away!"

And TenTen's voice, "Neji is MINE!"

I wake up then, covered in cold sweat. Something glacial touches my skin and I blink. It's the kunai.

I don't like them like that...

Kiba is my friend...Sasuke is my partner, just an acquiantance...and Neji is my _cousin_. Definitely not. _But what about Kiba? And Sasuke? You can't lie, Hinata...you can't lie from the truth. What you're feeling inside._

Then I jump up; realization hits me. _School! I'm late!_ I won't even consider brushing my teeth or washing my face - they're at my house, Hanabi's house. I can't even comprehend why I'd go there.

And I know there are multiple dark circles, contrasting sharply with my pale eyes. I always have tehm when I worry...

Memories fade back, from gray to color, to life, and tear pour in without warning.

_Kiba..._

I run out of the training grounds, hearing the birds cheep happily at winter. They're not bluebirds; that's for sure. The snow is already melting, and I'm forced to remember the happy times; laughing as Kiba pelts me with a snowball, as we pummel Rock Lee and his mentor to the ground...

A smile rushes to my face unthinkingly, even though the tears are still running.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_

I arrive at school, sweating, panting -

The school is dark. No lights. No one.

Only when I see that the door is closed, locked, do I realize that it's Sunday.

I sigh, inwardly extremely glad, and turn back.

I feel like the biggest idiot in the whole, wide, freaking world. I slowly start back to the training grounds, resolving to spend the whole day there, not interacting, not talking, to anyone. Not a single soul.

When I set foot onto the grass, though, a voice automatically growls, "You're bothering me."

"Huh?" I crane my neck; sure enough, there's a person lying on the hills, facing the clouds.

* * *

So who is it?? 

**GUESS!!**

I'll give you ten seconds!

One...

Two...

Three...fourfivesixseveneightnineten!! Time is up!

Just kidding. I'll tell you anyway. I'm not good at cliffies!

* * *

"Shikamaru?" 

He doesn't turn around. "Judging by how you step," he says slowly, "...You must be Hinata."

I stifle a smile despite everything that's happened, and sit next to him. "Can't you tell by my voice?"

"Um...yeah."

My smile grows; then I remember I'm supposed to be sad. Sullen. _I doubt that Sasuke is smiling right now..._

My merriness fades. Shikamaru doesn't turn around. "You sad?"

What? ..."Yeah..."

"This morning I saw you runing to school with a lonely face on...and also, I heard my neighbor screeching her head off about you...It woke me up," he explains.

I'm afraid to ask, but a smirk starts. "Ino."

"You better believe it."

Silence ensues. After two seconds I can't take it anymore; it's too leisurely...three months ago I would have never done this - start a conversation, broach a subject, but - "What are you doing?"

Finally he glances at me, then up again. "Watching...the clouds."

"The clouds?" I ask, then look up, too. There they are, as soft and as puffy as they always were. I squint, but they all appear to be the same, fat, lazy, boring. "What's that have to do with anything?"

He takes a couple of moments before answering, "They're...always...changing.

So you _are_ sad?"

"Um? Uh...yes."

"Why?"

So I tell him. I have nothing else better to do. "And...that's that. Sasuke probably hates my guts, and Kiba is...he thinks...I..." I trail off awkwardly.

"So do you?"

"N-no!" My conscience upbraids me, _Liar!_ I ignore it. _I'll talk to you later about that. _

_Liar!_

_Shut up._

"But Hinata...it's not such a big deal, you know? I mean, think of the world. Think of how many people are watching the clouds right now, with problems just like yours. On a bigger scale..."

"I...I know." But the truth is I _don't_ know. I don't know at all. But I want to, desperately. Find meaing of my existence. Find meaning in other people's existences, their lives. Where were we made? Why were we made?...to get mad at each other? To call each other sluts? Whores? It's not right...I feel suddenly sorry. Sasuke...I wonder how you are feeling right now...misunderstood?

"Watch the clouds, you know?" My attention immediately diverts back to his talk, "Maybe your true love is getting punished or something right in your face and you're just looking on, not doing anything." He closes his eyes. "Maybe the meaning is right there, latent. But it has potential, y'know?"

That's the most I've ever heard him say. I process his speech carefully. "Thanks, Shikamaru." My voice somehow doesn't crack, doesn't stutter. "Thanks."

I get off the cloud-watching hill, feeling rejuvenated, feeling...magical, even...like a butterfly ready to spread its wings.

I go home, square my shoulders. Maybe it's time to face my sister.

* * *

Preview of the next chapter: I just feel like typing. Ready? 

"I'm everything you're not. I was - I _am_ - jealous! Hiashi - Father - he loved you so much. More than me."

Okeee. Who said that??

XD

**Neji**: She needs a therapist. The smiles are ticking (in search of a better word) me off.

**Me **:D

**Neji**:...

**Me**: XD

**Neji**:...

**Me**:D

**Neji**:.. O.O

**Me**: Hahahahahaha!

**Neji**.. P-p-p-p-please review! (runs away)

**Me**:)


	21. Kiba's Arrival, Finale Chapter

"I'm everything you're not. I was - I _am_ - jealous! Hiashi - Father - he loved you so much. More than me."

It was Hinata!! XD PS. Luv to all but especally Fallenangel-vamp!

Disclaimer: Naruto is all Kishimoto's. ALL of it. (except Neji. He'll always be - WHACK.)

Neji: Hmph. I'd rather be Orochimaru's.

Lumberry: O.O That's going a bit too far. Hand over my cookies.

* * *

_What's the love that canot be swayed by friend, family, or foe?_

_Answer: None._

* * *

**November 9,** Year of the Crescent Moon 

Her door is locked but I knock softly, incessantly. Footsteps, then the door opens. One look - she remind me a lot of...myself...naive, shy inside, a flower ready to bloom. Her brows are scrunched together, confused, obviously thinking of how I brushed past her without a word the other day, but her eyes are full of curiosity. _Why, Hinata? Why...Oneechan...sister? Do you hate me that much?_

"Hinata? What?" No expressions of anger, bit it cuts incisively, right to the pith.

"I - I'm sorry, Hanabi." I can't believe this voice is mine. It's so fragile. "I've been such a hor-rible sister. I - "

Her eyes fill with tears and her knuckes whiten on the doorknob.

"I'm everything you're not. I was - I _am_ - jealous! Hiashi - Father - he loved you so much. More than he'd ever love me." Tears stream down her face, and it reminds me of how I am. I blindly continue, "I'm such a bad sister! I can't do anything - I'm the weakest of my group! Out of every - I mean, well - "

And they all hate me. And I hate a lot back. My life - it was in a ninety degree angle. Never to be righted again. But I fixed it, slowly. Slowly. Steadily. And now I'm going to fix the hell of my life. I will.

"Hinata! Y-you're more courageous than I am...It's all a lie." Her pale eyes are turning a slight shade of red as she still cries, "I'm not like this. I'm not! I'm not even brave enough to do confrontation. I'm sorry...I'm the one sorry!"

"No...he's dead, Hanabi. It's too late."

Her eyes widen. A noise escapes her lips, "I...I..."

A few seconds pass. Then her grip tightens on the doorknob.

The door slams.

* * *

He's walking across his house. "Neji!" 

As soon as he sees me, his eyes harden. "What, Hinata-sama?"

"I'm coming to say...I don't _need_ your protection anymore. If you call it that." My breath stops, not nervous, just waiting with anticipation.

His mouth opens slightly.

"You think you can boss me around. But I can take care of myself, no thank you!" I stand tall, and his emotionless face quickly _gets_ emotions. "That's it."

His mouth abruptly closes, but his eyes still look confused. "I never said - "

"Don't go saying what you never said. It doesn't make sense." I'm sick of this conversation already, so I pass him. About a few yards away, I feel compelled to give some sort of conclusion to my speech, "And what happened to your _hair_?"

* * *

That might have been too harsh...but it's a few problems solved. 

_When...you only have one life...it's best to make descisions quickly and live with the consequences, and then make even more choices to pave the way..._

_That way, you can make a lot of decisions..._

I have a few goals in life, now. I think I'm a bit different than when I first started eighth grade. And it makes me feel...immensely glad. Not only that, but relieved, too. Not saying I'm perfect. But when life threw me a few curve balls, I dodged them. The ones that hit me in my face, I stood back up.

_I'm changing...I really, truly, am..._

* * *

**November 15,** Year of the Crescent Moon 

_- 6 days later - _

"Roorrrrf! Arf!" growls Akamaru, now fully healed, jumping on top of his small, dog-sized cot.

"What?" I question - I'm spending the day at the hospital because one, I have nothing better to do - it's a break from school - and two...I have nothing better to do...

"Kroorf!" He jumps up, his tail expertly wagging. His nose points in the direction of the door. "Brerf!"

I pick him up - technically, he's all again, just waiting for Kiba to sign a few papers as his owner - and out the door. We both need fresh air. The hospital smells like - speaking...of hospitals, Sasuke was out a few days ago. He's well again...I haven't seen him since when...

"ARGHF!!!" he shrieks - barks. He squirms and his little nails make half-moons on my palms. Akamaru sure does have a lot of energy for one so small. His enthusiasm for whatever - it's overflowing!

I sigh reluctantly, but follow him anyway; despite my apparent hesitance I enjoy the sunshine, the busy streets of Konoha... and I can't believe I said that...

Far away there's a person standing just inside of Konoha's main gate, walking slowly with a small, heavy-looking blue pack...even from a distance I know who it is, the red markings on his sunny expression.

_Kiba!_

The first thing he sees is Akamaru, and his arms open, but the little puppy jumps directly onto his messy nest of brown hair. Kiba grins - and I find myself smiling, almost laughing, even, to see him back. I've missed him. And his grin. His heart's so bighearted, so generous.

He sees me and throw his bag over his shoulder. "Hi, Hinata!"

"Hi, Kiba. How was the mission?" Our feet fall in sync effortlessly.

"Boring, really. Too easy."

I'm happy for the warm sunshine, if nothing else. "That's good...I'm...glad you're back." What I didn't say is the double-edged meaning it holds. Yes, I'm glad he's back. I'm _also_ glad I have a chance to take up his time so I'll tell him about what happened.

There's no point in delaying any further. I really want to get our relationship set straight. At least, for now...

"About...that time..."

"_That _time, right?" He sighs and looks at me. "I know."

Confused, my eyes narrow. "You know what?"

He looks embarassed, but plunges onward.

"I know that...it was...Sakura."

I've had six days to think about scenarios but not a single one holds this theory. "Wh-_What?!"_

He sighs again. I want to see his smile. "When I...well, I didn't mean to. I really knew it was Sakura." He points to his nose. "She smells slightly of cherry blossoms. Even without Akamaru, I know that..." He trails off and his eyebrows rise. "I just...for that second that you - she - fell, I really thought it was you. I don't know. Maybe because of your...clumsi - " He looks frustrated, but I need to know. "Never mind. Sorry I brought that up."

Why...why??

"It's no big deal. I'm sorry for that. It was an accident, and I...I was impulsive."

A minute of silence. I don't know what to say. "That's okay."

We've reached his house. Akamaru yips, plainly glad to see his house again. "See you, Hinata."

_Wait! _I feel like screaming. But of course I'm too cowardly for even that. It's too fast. I'm on a speeding, spinning merry-go-round without clinging onto anything. But I don't know what to say, so, "Bye, Kiba."

I need to sort this out, both mentally and emotionally. I turn around -

"Oh, and Hinata?" He's standing on his porch looking slightly flustered. Akamaru is nowhere in sight. "About you..."

_What?! _

"...you smell like lavender. Just so you know." That's a definite blush on his cheeks - or is it just his smeared blood-red Inuzuka markings?

Either way, I'm compelled to reply. But before I can he waves a hasty good bye, and closes the door lightly. I'm left by myself, so I have no choice but to return home._

* * *

_

_Sasuke...Kiba...Ino...Naruto...all my teachers, all my relatives, my family...even my father...and even Sakura...thank you..._

* * *

That was a short chapter, yes, but I have so much to tell XD And plus it's a cliffie XD

Okay. Starting from now I'm going to start a sequel. Another fanfic, you could say, but the point is, I'm not continuing "The Life and Story of Hinata." No. Her story is over. It's told. Her past.

Here begins her _life_.

That means, she's not depressed anymore! Kudos to all you readers out there who reviewed and stayed by me the whole time. Let's see...NaruHinaLuver, NinjaGirl5848, RayneRevenge, PoeticFrenzy, Inspira748, Fallenangel-vamp, can't think of anyone else right now, SORRY!! Email or PM me, so I can add you on XD It's not much trouble.

Let's see...I think the next fanfic - the sequel - is going to be called "**Kiss Me, Kiss Me**." I don't know. It's the rhythm or something, but I love the title so far (don't you?). It's going to be about a dance... (I'm obsessed with dancing, no not me, I meant, _writing_ about dancing. Personally I can't dance!) (Like You Think You Can Dance, Hmm?)

And Hinata...is going to be paired with...

_shh!!_

But whatever. So you've had a taste of her life. Now begins...the better life. Erk. This conclusion is turning out really badly!

As for myself, I'm a really hasty person, so if you, Reader, don't like my choice, anyone can PM me to let me know and maybe I'll write more. But seriously. It's a sequel. Sane tone, same POV, same characters, same story. Just...well, a small, two month time skip and stuff like that.

Okay. I've been blabbing too much. Happy Christma-Hanu-Kwanzaa to everyone. EVERYONE. Yah, even Neji, of course!! XD

Lumberry


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